Recycle Bin

Lust

2012-02-12T03:22:00.000-08:00

View of Tokyo from Mt Takao and I'm too lazy to remember the date -.-

Have you ever go through that phase where all you can think about is too eat? Well here I am.

The past few weeks I've been eating non-stop. I mean like seriously... Lepas makan nasi, makan Mister Potato, lepastu minum yogurt, lepas tu makan puding, lepas tu kalau agak-agak kalau macam nafsu tak boleh tahan, makan lah maggi. I consumed junk foods up to twice a week too. E.R.G.H. Lepas tu rutin wajib, tidur. No wonder my face got a little bit chubby. In addition, I think my fat lost it's way. My thighs seems to get bigger but ONLY my things. This sucks.

Prove? I weighed right after eating at my aunt's house and the reading was 42.8 kg. And the other day I weighed early in the morning which means the only thing I've digested is coffee. And guess what? 44.5 kg. Don't make that face or laugh at me. 1.7 kg membawa impak yang besar okay?

It's true I've always been an underweight but damn. Gaining weight doesn't feel good.

I need to stop now. That's all. The confession of a food addict. Got tuition in half an hour. May force be with me and I can restrained myself from disappointing the creator of the food pyramid. That person must be hating me right now.

No more tears left to be shed

2012-01-23T16:32:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum

Pardon my albino eyebrow and my double chin-ness. Thanks to Andy for the name tag.

I gave up on the idea of a perfect birthday about ages ago.

Nevertheless, happy birthday dear me. I might not like you very much but we'll change and we'll fit in our own skin one day. For all the hardship may come, remember, you're stronger than this. InsyaAllah, We'll be here again next year to celebrate our day. For now, let's survive. One day at a time. Sincerely, yourself.

From strangers to something more

2012-01-22T16:36:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum


Apabila Rafidah mula menggila.

Tradisi setiap yang baru, sesi penderaan-secara-besar-besaran-menggunakan-kuasa-veto-yang-telah-tertakluk-dalam-buku-hijau-unit-kokurikulum also known as Orientasi Pelajar Tingkatan Satu.

Telling the truth, orientasi tu sangat kelam kabut sebenarnya. Aku banyak lupa bawa barang dan aktiviti tak sepadan dengan masa sebab cikgu nak habis cepat. Tapi sebagai seorang senior yang sangat bajet terrer, saya cover bagus. Alhamdulillah, last-last, everything falls together. Aku rasa tak perlu terangkan secara detail macam mana orientasi tu berlansung. It will be our dirty little secret. Hekhekhek. (Malas sebenarnya)

Terima kasih kepada Hazirah, Cak, Fidah, Raja and Ziqah sebab sudi tolong. Datang hari sabtu, korbankan peluang nak tengok pakwe diorang serve makanan dekat wedding anak pengetua. Chu gais de besh lew. Mac lep!

P/S : Aku tak tau siapa yang lagi have fun. Kami, fasi-fasi atau pelajar form 1....

I have a hard time choosing which picture to be put in this post.

We wrote our names in blood

2012-01-13T18:01:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum.

From left : Azzura, Sahira and of course, me.

You know what is sad plus insecure? Sad plus insecure is when you look THAT ROUND in a picture! I mean, freaking look at me. Almost like I'm keeping two doughnuts inside my mouth to even look that round. For now let's blame the tudung sekolah and the camera for the optical trick. I'm not that round okay. I'm not an anorexic or bulimia but I don't expect myself to look like that. I weighed 42.8 kg and 154cm, in other word, underweight. God! Hoping I'm not becoming like one of those girls who worry too much about their body.

Anyway, school is just starting and I'm still going strong. You know what sucks to be in my class? Everything you do is because you're 5STA1. Why are you so noisy? Because you're 5STA1. Why are you late to lab? Because you're 5STA1. Why are you saying you understand in class even when you have no idea? Because you're 5STA1. Everyone expect us to be perfect and when we screwed up, it's because we have our ego too high.

When we first entered upper form, the teachers said there's no ranking in class but every time you do something wrong, "Tu lah, awak ingat awak pandai sangat. 5STA1 lah katakan." How are we supposed to feel when the teachers also set standards. Levels. Separating us from other classes. Maybe unconsciously we do have egos that we're not aware of. Maybe even I do. But that is not because we're in 5STA1. It's just us.

P/S : Why don't people think that they made us this egoistic? Saying we're 5STA1 over and over again like it's some kind of a whole new level we are in?

Just because it's a tradition, doesn't mean it's right

2011-12-31T11:39:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum

Tokyo Tower [9/12/2011]

People are busy wishing Happy New Year in their blog, Twitter and Facebook but here I am like, Serena Van Der Woodsen is gorgeous.... I'm sorry if some people get offended by me not wishing them the obvious but I just don't feel like it for some reason I don't know how to explain.

Since I only have Twitter and not Facebook, I can only see about only a quarter of what's going on but people have been tweeting about how they can't get out to celebrate/party with friends and boyfriends. Some are sad that their parents are being 'over-protective' and some are really enjoying themselves at a party or whatever. What really hit me? Most of them are muslims. I'm not a good muslim myself but I know the boundaries. Islam doesn't teach us to celebrate new year (which is by the way not kalander Islam) having parties, fireworks, concerts, countdowns, hanging out with mixing genders.

And I'm just going to stop there. I'm no good in talking about this.

On the other hand, I AM UN-OFFICIALLY FREAKING SEVENTEEN. I mean, people in my age have magazine dedicated specially for us!!! Anyway, I just want to be good, you know? Got a lot to prove this year and a lot of responsibility on my shoulder. Let's just hope I'll do well.

Last year of high school, here we go.

P/S : It's 3:34AM and I am hungry like crazy but I'm too scared to go to the kitchen. Pathetic seventeen me.

A must do for every blogger

2011-12-28T11:32:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum.

Kyoto, Japan [11/12/2011]

10 years ago I was in my last year of kindergarten. Now? I'm going into my last year of high school. Know what, I think time owns a private jet plane that fly like super fast. 2011 was by far the worst/hardest/crappiest - just basically every negative adjective there are - year for me but that doesn't mean I'm eager for 2012 and want 2011 to end.

I don't know what to expect next year but someone told me to expect something better although I don't see how's that possible. She won't be in school next year and that sucks and going to be hard for me. I know I'm going to look back and laugh for all the tears I've wasted on useless things but I don't think it's anytime soon. 2011 is not something I'm proud of.

Nevertheless, I know all that I've been through this year helped me to be a better person. If not better, stronger. More rational. Allah has everything planned out for me, for that I'm sure of. In 2012, my goal will be solely : making my parents proud. Things will be rocky and hard for the additional fact that I'll be facing SPM and what my brother once said haunt me like a freaking ghost. What he said? "Dalam adik beradik mesti ada sorang yang slack. PMR abang tak okay. SPM, Yaa ah nanti yang tak okay." NOT EXACTLY A DREAMY BROTHER.

Anyhow, have a safe journey ahead readers.

'There were two ways to be happy : improve your reality, or lower your expectations."

- Jodi Picoult, Nineteen Minutes.

Anywhere and nowhere all at once

2011-12-20T03:33:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Saya takde boypreng. Takde buah hati. Jadi nak lepas rindu dekat mereka-mereka ni jelah. Tapi lagi sorang belum. Yang budak RC tu. Yang bagi kita keychain jersey tu. Nanti kita jumpa eh awak? Hehe.

P/S : I tend to write less than 180 words these days. I mean, who would love my writing anyway.

Such a cold cold world

2011-11-30T06:22:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum?

" Aku ada impian,
Aku ada impian,
Impian aku sedang tidur.
Penat. Berehat. "
- Bogel Menuju Tuhan, Zahiril Adzim.

Tau apa impian aku? Aku taknak mak ayah aku susah hati, nangis sebab kerenah anak dara tunggal mereka seorang ni. Tau apa impian aku? Aku nak mak ayah aku bangga dengan aku.

Setakat ni? Belum tercapai.

Aku cita-cita pun takde. Cikgu? Doktor? Pharmacist? Tukang sapu sampah? Banyaknya tanda soal dalam satu entri. Ni dah kronik. Oh, dah masuk tahun baru kan? Selamat menunaikan azam-azam sejak tahun 1995 yang aku sangat pasti belum tertunai tu ya. (khas untuk yang sama umur dengan aku je)

Saat di mana Blogger memusnahkan kualiti gambar.
Put that aside, aku nak macam ni sampai bila-bila. Boleh?

I'm a sucker for friendship

2011-11-13T05:55:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Sorry for the low quality picture.

Ramai yang taknak masuk 4STA1 tahun depan bila dengar ada dirombak kelas. Percayalah, aku pun kalau boleh nak keluar sebab aku tak rasa aku duduk sekelas dengan manusia bila setiap kali exam, ada je yang dapat 98% atau 100% untuk Addmath. Dan, 84 untuk paper 2 Chemistry adalah cukup rendah bagi Andrew. Tapi bagus jugak, at least aku berusaha untuk dapat lebih baik sebab rasa hina je bila markah berbatu-batu jauhnya dengan Goh Wei Pin -,-

Sekejap. Aku yang kurang bijak atau mereka yang terlebih pandai? Hmm.

Anyway, thumbs up untuk jamuan kelas! Aku hargai penat lelah Syafiqah Hamzah dan Shafini dalam menjayakan jamuan tersebut. Hearing someone complaining about something we work hard for is never a good feeling. Budak kelas aku mostly annoying dan selfish (termasuk aku) tapi 2011 aku, dihabiskan bersama mereka. Kami sama-sama dengar cikgu perli kami, kena marah, gelak sama-sama, jalan pergi makmal sama-sama, kongsi bekal satu kelas. That should count for something.

They said, friendship last forever

2011-11-08T02:51:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Sebab kau Syaz, aku upload gambar ni meskipun aku kelihatan seperti peserta The Biggest Loser. Ada gambar lama kita dekat luar kelas kau mase kau form 3 tapi masalahnya dah hilang sebab hard disk lama aku rosak. Ergh.

Minggu ni minggu last form 4 sekolah. Minggu depan form 5 exam. Tahun depan aku form 5. Itu manipulated variables. Kita terus meloncat pada konklusi. Konklusinya, tahun depan aku dah tak jumpa Nursyazwani Zakaria :'( *Aduh, sebak dah ni*

Nanti kawad, dah takde gambar kita sama-sama lagi. Kau dah tak command Kadet Polis. Kelas 5RC pun dah takde kau weh. Nanti kau sambung belajar, kau lupa aku! Pergh.. Sedih siod. Aku tahun depan macam mana?! Nanti kalau aku touching-touching aku nak kesat hingus dekat siapa? Nanti aku nak nganjing kilat dengan siapa? Nanti siapa atlet rumah Abu Bakar weh? Siapa nak cerita dekat aku pasal kilat? Aku.. Eh.. Sadis lah macam ni..

Dua post dah pasal kau, tolong la bangga. Anyway, good luck SPM. Jangan asyik ingat aku je, jawab Fizik tu betul-betul. Walaupun aku tau kau takkan baca ni sebab sibuk study, tetap nak cakap all the best. Aku sayang kau! Minggu ni kita last jumpa! Kau sedar tak?!?!?!?!?!

The world is a mad place

2011-11-01T05:30:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Okay aku mengaku.. Keychain jersi nombor 23 tu.. Lagi comel dari aku.. Bukan senang aku nak mengaku kenyataan ni. *Kesat air mata. Nada suara macam dalam cerita Isabella sikit.* Tapi orang yang bagi lagi comel lah. Ihik :P *Bodek sikit biar lepas ni mana tau dia bagi jersi yang real punya?*

Haha, thanks Syaz. Gila sayang kau ah! :D Ini bukan nombor bertuah saya or whatever. Saya suka nombor 23 dan itu satu fakta. Kan macam comel tu. 2 dengan 3. Atototo! *Apakah..* Bukannya kalau hari ni saya pakai baju 23, saya akan bertuah sepanjang hari. Abang-abang hensem semua akan usha saya. Karaoke dekat Kluang Mall tu tak payah bayar. Bukannya kalau saya buat wish pada jam 2323, wish saya akan jadi kenyataan. Eh? -,-

P/S : 11:11 or 11/11/11 is just a same number in continuous form. Bukannya kalau wish pada pukul 11:11 , impian kita memang akan jadi kenyataan. Careful of what you believe in. Google Translate tu pun bukan boleh percaya sangat.

All I'm good at is, regretting things

2011-10-21T02:32:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum

Just another paper I sucked at.

Ayah saya cakap, kalau saya tak dapat 7A, beliau akan tarik segala kemudahan dunia maya dan dunia realiti saya.
Manakala ayah Syaf cakap, kalau Syaf dapat 1A dapat RM20. 2A, RM4o dan seterusnya.
Ibunda Hazirah pula cakap, dia kena dapat 9A. Tiada hukuman, tiada ganjaran.

Tell me how does this world works again?

And yes, I'm sensing lots of B's and C's for my final exam. Procrastinating rules and now regrets are taking over. Nice life I got here.

This one for you

2011-10-18T01:21:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Some of my happiest moment. I miss us.

Nur 'Ainaa binti Muhd Khairudin,
Happy birthday, sister. I miss you :*

p/s: 'Ainaa is the one I'm hugging in the first picture.

They told me to shut up

2011-10-14T00:42:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Taken by Hazirah, edited by me.

Have you ever have that one particular scent that bring you back to the old days? Well, if I smell this Lancome - Miracle Forever perfume, I'll be reminded of Pangkor. The Pangkor trip happened almost (or maybe already is) a year ago. But I can still remember I called Syaz behind the chalet crying my eyes out. Building sandcastle. Playing beach bowling. Eating burger by the sea. Sounded like a sick fairytale but that's what happened so it shall be MY sick fairytale. So, yeah..

Oh! The smell of the road after the rain reminded me when I was hit by a car. I'm in standard 3 at that time. Bau baju busuk pulak reminded me of camping. Bau telur busuk? Reminded me of Hazirah dengan Syaf. HAHA -,- What's with the bahasa rojak? I'm freaking universal, don't mind me.

P/s: Wish me luck for exam next week. I will be playing with lots of numbers. And yes, I'm getting lame-er and boring-er by the day. Kill me now.

Don't you remember? You said forever.

2011-10-01T04:51:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

One week left until final exam and my preparation? None. Screw Greenday for waking me up when September ends.

Oh yeah, the video is very random. It was recorded from my phone's app '8mm'. Had the app for along time but baru rasa nak guna dan gilos lawa kan warna dia? Tetapi Blogger telah merosakkan kualiti video tersebut. Shit. Dan! Dalam video tu adalah kali pertama saya main gitar elektrik (Hazirah's). Kekok nk pegang sebab nipis sangat -,- Dan! Saya ganti sendiri tali gitar tu tanpa menonton sebarang tutorial. Ohh me so jakun and berlagak laik dat ya know?

Yes, I sucked at playing guitar. I know. And towards the end, I forgot the chord. Okay. Goodbye.

Love you like a love song

2011-09-28T08:16:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Berbekalkan ilmu yang cetek di dada dan streamyx di rumah, aku dengan beraninya menukar tali gitar sendiri. Yes. Sendiri! Sebelum ni pernah sekali je tukar dan itu pun orang kedai yang buat. Kali ni tak boleh tahan! Bunyi gitar dah sadis noh dengar! Jadi terpaksa tukar sebab malas nak bawak gitar berat-berat. Ya, bunyi gitar macam haram, aku salahkan tali instead of diri sendiri tak pandai main. Ihik :P

Oh ya tadi dekat tandas saya kena sengat dengan binatang! Tapi watlek je, basuh sikit, masuk delam kelas, study macam biasa. <-- tiba-tiba...

My point being, saya bangga saya mampu berdikari. Walaupun masa tukar tali first sampai bengkang-bengkok talinya. Tak reti nak wind. HAHA. Lameeeeee. Okay okay. Jadi kalau nak suruh saya buat persembahan, satu lagu tiga ribu, dua lagu enam ribu, tiga lagu, kira lah sendiri. Anything, just contact my manager okay? K. Much love.

Psstt, kalau bunyi teruk lagi, aku akan salahkan si Mikatone ni ha.

We human, are built to last.

2011-09-26T02:19:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

I've love KRSTK (P) ever since the day Kak Meen ajak me and Aliaa to join marching. We were in form 1 when that happen. When I leave STK, I will miss KRSTK for sure :)

Psstt, my endang-ers are shoo shoooo cute okay? :DD

Memories

2011-09-22T03:48:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Saya tak tau nak tulis apa. Dah banyak kali, taip, delete, taip, delete. So, bai =='

Sense the sarcasam

2011-09-19T03:12:00.000-07:00

Beware : This post is going to be soo long and melancholic. Not to mention annoying. And very girly. Ergh. What else? Oh, broken grammars.

I've acknowledge that I am very pathetic. I mean, how pathetic can someone get? I think I'm on the highest level. It's not fun, at all. When all you can do is break, cry, fake a smile, fake a laugh, reminisce, get angry. And the cycle continues. While the other party is, well, partying. It's not the greatest feeling being the only one who's broken, who tried all one could to not fall apart each moment, who's keep remembering the promises while the other half is moving on. Just. Like. That. Like what you did is normal and nothing's wrong.

It's been hard. Waking up to no new text from you. Went to sleep without saying goodnight to you. Having to lost my appetite because of you. No phone calls, no annoying voice telling how you are 'Bruno Mars'. Singing to every song you know in the world with that funny voice. Telling you how my days went. Hearing about you and your friends. Having to look away from you because if I kept on staring, I will cry. Hearing your laugh. Fight with you over silly things. I miss to call you names. I miss you calling me names. Trust me. It had been soooo fckng hard.

I've been with you since day one. I mean like literally day one. We sat together during the first day of standard one with Erra on my other side. And since that day, we've been friends. Don't ask how many time we got into fights. Countless. I think the 'biggest fight' was when we were in standard 5. We were divided into two groups, hating each other because I made up a song, nganjing-ing your name. (Shit. This just made me smile -,-) I've received a call from you saying you won't contact me again. I've been abandoned. I've been blamed for being the reason why your relationship didn't work. I've been attacked by your ex. I've been there for all the trash talk.

But everytime we fight, we just ran back to each other. No matter how hard, how stupid our mistakes are, all were forgiven. A few drops of tears, some 'I'm sorry' and 'Promise I won't do it again' would do the magic. Some would call this stupid. Some would call this bullshit. But I call it 'you'. And still, you = stupid. (Lol, sorry.) Based on our ten years of friendship experience, I think you have the idea that no matter how hard you messed things up, I'll still accept you. Well, surprise, surprise. I always do. I can't say no to you.

I value friendship over relationship. You've been through my thick and thin. You've seen and heard me cried countless times. Remember when we were in form 2? Yeah, I cried in front of you outside your class because of those girls. I cried telling how stupid I am for believing. For accepting him. And I've heard your stories too. I've heard about your family problems, how your dad always get to your nerves, how you're having wonderful time with your friends, how you love your classmates, how you hate that girl for betraying your trust. There's too much memories with you. (Teringat balik ni pun dah sebak.)

I can't stay mad forever ~~since I don't want wrinkles~~ and I've once made a promise to you that we will be friends. No matter what happen afterwards. Although you didn't keep your words, I just have to keep mine. I can't pray for you to suffer for what you have done to me. That's just not right because once upon a time, you were everything I've ever wanted. (And still are actually) You're my best friend. My everything. So instead I will pray for your happiness. For I can't be your happiness, I wish someone else can and change you to be a better person. Tell you to respect your parents and not to neglect your studies. You said you want to become an engineer. Or maybe a pilot. Work on that.

I won't warn the others to stay away form you. That no matter how many times you said you've changed, you never do. That you're just a sweet talker. Your words can't be trusted. That you will just broke yet another heart. Another spirit to live. Because everyone deserve to be happy. To be loved. Tak baik tamak, halang kebahagiaan orang lain. Berkorban untuk kebahagiaan orang lain adalah pengorbanan yang paling besar.

Yes you broke my heart. You broke me. You've turned me into someone I strongly despise right now. I let my wall down for you and block others who really cared about me. What you did to me was heartless and ... I don't know. Heartless. Tapi kita tiada hak untuk tidak memaafkan orang lain. I can't forbid you from being happy and force you to be sad. To be broken just like me. This is me. Trying to move on without you. Trying to not fake a smile. To not fake a laugh. I know you're happy right now and although it pains me to see that, I got no choice. This is not ego. You know me too well for my ego to even work on you. I won't take revenge on you. Flirt with some other guys to show that I'm okay because I am fucking not.

"Masa dengan Capang dulu awak tak macam ni pun ek?" No. You mean so much more than him. You mean too much sometimes that a rational thinking is not an option. But no matter how special you are to me. How you are practically 'my everything' , I'm just going to be another someone to you. Another girl. Another friend. Another someone. (I know, I repeated this twice.) So let promises be just another broken promises. Left there. Without the effort to even fulfill it. Let these tears be another tears wasted on you. May one day i'll find my happiness. InsyaAllah.

p/s: I still got sooo much more to say but I think this is long enough. Otherwise, I won't be able to stop typing.

Sorry for the damage

2011-09-14T08:01:00.001-07:00

Assalamualaikum.

Bagi saya peluang sekali ni je saya nak tacing. Bagi saya peluang sekali je nak cakap ape yang terasa nak cakap ni. Saya dah berazam, untuk tabahkan diri. Tapi rasa macam tak boleh je ni. Saya punya mata sakit sebab banyak sangat keluarkan cecair. Kadang-kadang tak boleh berhenti wa cakap lu -,-

It had been really hard. Hanging on all of your promises, sweet words, waiting for you to come back, for you to say that I'm worth it. To see you break like how I am breaking right now. I really thought 'this is it'. 'This is my happiness'. For a while, it was all I ever wanted. And along the way you changed. maybe you realized that I'm not her. And I can never be. Maybe I was a lab rat. To see whether you can move on or not. And clearly, not. Seeing you move on so fast is just a slap on my face because here I am. Missing you. So much. Like an idiot.

*Tak boleh sambung, tak tau macam mana nak teruskan. Wtf.*

I don't know how to put this in words. But all I know is that,
I'm not okay. I'm not fucking okay :)

All the time, it hurts

2011-09-05T05:37:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Walaupun aku sendiri agak antagonis terhadap manusia yang keyboard mereka rosak kerana hanya menaip 'SHR' dan 'HB' tapi takkan aku nak buat light trail panjang-panjang tulis Selamat Hari Raya? Memang tak raya lah aku jawabnya.

Dan maaf lambat ucap Selamat Hari Raya. Alamak, lekluu, raya kan sebulan :DD Bukan apa, streamyx dan line internet kena sambar petir masa malam 1 Syawal. Meletup dan terbakar. In cerita benar. Dua orang nyaris tercedera tapi otak mereka bergerak pantas dengan segera bergerak menjauhi apa-benda-tu yang melayang laju. Kenapa aku macam sedang menaip novel Tanpamu Aku Rindu? Mungkin sebab hari tu A. Samad Said beraya rumah aku. Tolong jangan percaya.

Apa-apa pun, kenapa 133 hamba Allah yang ikut blog ni, Selamat Hari Raya :) Ampunkan segala terkasaran bahasa, tersinggunan di hati nya, terannoying di matanya. Maafkan daku insan yang serba kekurangan ini. Semoga bergembira mendengar lagu Raya dendangan Dayang Ku Intan. Ai pogot tajuk lagu dia ==

Okay bai nak sambung belajar. Much love everyone, xoxo.

You're like a broken record

2011-08-28T08:08:00.000-07:00

"Don't forget me", I begged

"I'll remember", you said

"Sometimes it lasts in love

But sometimes it hurts instead."

Adele - Someone Like You

This song had been in my head for weeks now.

Getting bored by day

2011-08-27T18:50:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum.

Tak tau nak cakap macam mana... For starter, hari tu pergi berbuka dgn anak-anak di atas. Nasib baik puasa, aku tak kesah Syaf nak kongsi tomyam dgn aku sebab abang tu lupa Syaf ade order tomyam jugak. Kalau bkn bulan puasa, mimpi lah nak datang dekat pun dengan tomyam aku. I bought a red loafer and two t-shirts. Nak raya? Tak lah sangat. Suam-suam kuku je.

Itu hari Jumaat. Kemudian hari Sabtu :

Keluar dengan kakak/kawan baik/makwe/ape-jelah-kau-rasa-nak-panggil. Bawak kereta dia pusing-pusing bandar. Akhirnya tertunai pun janji dia dan impian aku. Ihik. Dan dapat juga makan Kenny Rogers walaupun taklah sedap mana -,-

Dan asyik jumpa budak ni jeh ..

Stalker? Haha =='

I hate you on principle

2011-08-20T01:40:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Jangan cakap sesuatu kalau diri sendiri tak maksudkan. Consequences, hanya akan beri harapan dekat orang lain, menyakitkan hati diri sendiri malah lebih menyakitkan hati orang lain. Jangan jadikan aku sebagai jalan keluar. Jalan mudah. Jangan janji kalau kau tau kau takkan tunaikan. Jangan libatkan diri kalau kau tau kau tak boleh beri komitmen. Jangan buat macam aku ni tak wujud, takde perasaan.

Mungkin aku yang memperbodohkan diri sendiri sebab buat-buat tak nampak, tak faham. Asyik cakap 'takpee'. Hanya sebab dah ada label, jangan ingat aku tak boleh pergi macam tu je. Aku taklah sebodoh yang kau sangka. Aku bukan tak tahu selok belok Facebook tu. Aku dah ada PhD dalam bidang menye-stalk orang ni. Aku bukan tak tahu perangai kau. Kita kenal bukan semalam. Kau pernah sakitkan hati aku bukan sekali.

I'm willing to give as much as I can take.

So, exam last week was a disaster. With me feeling not so well. Coughing and sneezing non-stop in class doesn't help much. Idea wasn't flowing and what I read disappear as soon as the paper landed on my table. Let's hope I didn't fail any subject and my parents will not be that mad.

xoxo,
Gossip Girl -.-

Deja Vu

2011-08-14T02:23:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Memandangkan dua sahabat handai aku tu dah post pasal lawatan sambil cuci mata di hospital, aku pun nak jugak! Aku punya special sikit. Ada gambar! Real punya! Walaupun berita ni belum diketahui umum, maafkan aku Faridzwan, aku dah ketandusan idea nak update blog aku ni.

Maafkan kitorang datang tak bawak ape-ape. Bukan ape, kalau kitorang bawakkan air, takut tak sempat masuk dlm wad, dah habis dah. Kira okay la kan. Kalau dipertimbangkan pengorbanan kitorang nak ke hospital tu, boleh sempat gugur jantung aku ni. Lagi-lagi, kitorang bawakkan Safwa untuk kau. Walaupun sebenarnya Safwa yang bawak kitorang =='

Yang penting, cepat sembuh ye Faridzwan Rosli. Mak aku siap hantarkan popia basah untuk kau, fizik tak dapat A+ , aku tak tau nk cakap ape :)

Pesanan penaja : Tabahkan diri kau. Jangan biar dia gunakan kau lagi.

When no one's around, I practice saying the words you'll never hear.

2011-08-10T13:55:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Duduk depan komputer bersama line internet sejurus selepas sahur.

Misi : Cari katalog untuk kerja kursus akaun.

Status : Tidak berjaya.
Halangan : Facebook dan Blogger. Dan result carian Google yang merepek.

I'm never good with temptation. Selalu sangat kalah. Nasib baik lah waktu puasa aku takde ambil air Ling Ching. Taklah tergoda sangat. Alhamdulillah, genap 10 hari berpuasa. Tapi aku rasa Ramadhan aku tahun ni paling sunyi. Tak bercahaya. Makna di sebalik ayat? Cuba tanya Puan Tursinaini, guru BM aku.

Anyway, minggu depan exam PK2. Preparation? None. *Emm, kenapa ya aku rasa macam semua ayat aku tergantung-gantung? Mungkin selepas sering kali dibiarkan terkapai-kapai kot.* Dalam hati niat memang dah ada nak revise. Tapi masa habis dekat kerja rumah je. Petang pulak dah ngantuk. Bila time meragam, kepala mula pening. Tapi InysaAllah, akan gagahkan diri untuk study. Yang akan ambil exam jugak, do your best and good luck.

Nota kaki : Kalau kau rasa nak pergi, nak pulang ke sana. Pergilah :)

Just a thought

2011-08-06T20:26:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum.

Aku tak tau kenapa semakin lama, semakin jahil aku jadinya. Berguni-guni teguran, nasihat dah aku dengar. Jarang korek teliga mungkin, makanya semua aku abaikan. Aku tak nafikan, aku yang dulu, jauh beza dengan aku yang sekarang. Kalau diberi pilihan, aku lebih rela jadi Alyaa yang dulu.

Aku tak rasa makin matang. Cuma leka. Alpa.

Genetic problem

2011-08-04T09:23:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Bagi aku, subjek paling susah masuk otak untuk form 4 adalah Chemistry dan Physics. Dan tolong jangan judge bila aku sebut Physics. Memang mak aku ajar Physics but mannnnnn, tu mak aku. Bukan aku. Jadi tolonglah jangan buat assumptions yang magically aku akan teror Physics jugak.

Lu orang bikin gua bengang bila lu tanya gua equlibrium of forces dan additional of forces, gua tak dapat jawab. Cara lu orang tanya memang mcm confirm gua dapat jawab. Bila tak dapat, last-last gua jugak yang bengang -,-

Lagi-lagi sekarang ni bulan Ramadhan. <-- tiba-tiba... ... ...

Anyways, selamat berpuasa! Semangat raya, lagu raya, baju raya, kuih raya mama keri tu simpan lah dulu. Puasa belum separuh bulan pun, dah mula main lagu raya. Dah makan kuih samperit dkt satu balang. Hormatilah Ramadhan. Manfaatkan sebaiknya sementara kita masih boleh sambut :) Ini peringatan untuk aku jugak.

Please just stay for a while

2011-07-30T07:22:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Terasa sangat kekok nak mulakan ... Macam mana eh nak cakap? Okay la, buat tahap budak tadika punya entry lah ...

So, dua minggu lepas aku tinggal kelas Add Math semata-mata demi tunas-tunas KRS yang memerlukan khidmat aku. Maksud aku, khidmat kami. Maka pergilah kami ke Ulu Dengar. Ni bikin public humiliation sikit, kerana camping ni lah, akhirnya aku menjejakkan kaki ke Ulu Dengar buat pertama kalinya. Fuuu, anak bandar betul =='

Dua minggu tinggal kelas Math Mode jugak rasa sikit berbaloi sebab aku jumpa budak ni :

Adam yang solat sambil tutup mata tu. Khusyuk betul adik aku ni.

Faiz sah-sah lah yang tengah-tengah kan -,-

Adam dan Faiz. Memang lepas balik camping fasa pertama dan pergi semula untuk fasa kedua, rasa sebak sendu sedan lah. Takde lagi budak kecik jerit nama aku lepas balik kembara. Takde lagi budak jerit nama aku bila aku lalu dekat dengan khemah diorang. Sumpah rindu dekat Faiz ;( Naqib pun.

Namun bergitu, aku pergi sana bukan lah berfoya-foya semata-mata. Tolong jangan buat tuduhan melulu. Aku mengajar ikatan dan simpulan serta kawad kaki. Tolong buat gajet. Hoh dan handle malam kebudayaan. Untuk fasa kedua, aku jadi MC. Jangan main-main. Bukti? FINE.

Tapi sebenarnya, adelah berfoya-foya sikit. Sempat lah buat flying fox dan water confident walaupun takde slot untuk kitorang. Yang penting, aku have fun. Tapi bila balik sekolah, terkedek-kedek ah kejar study. Masa dlam kelas AddMath sumpah rasa bodoh sangat-sangat sebab aku tak faham satu ape. Konklusinya, aku sayang budak empat ekor ni :

Yang budak laki nye, sayang la jugak. Sikit ... Kecuali Arifuddin! ==' K bai.

Be proud of who you are

2011-07-22T07:49:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Dah lama rasanya aku menghilang. Labah-labah yang bersarang pun dah ada keluarga kembangan aku rasa. Rasa je lah.

Hari tu tertengok slot virus k-pop yang tersebar di seantero dunia dlm Berita Harian. Kening aku ternaik sikit sebelah. Bersungguh-sungguh ye anak muda belajar Bahasa Korea? Bahasa Syurga tu entah tau ke tidak. Siap belajar menari. Memasak. Ade baiknya kau belajar masak botok-botok. Dari belajar buat ramen. Aku pun minat k-pop tapi taklah setaksub itu. Entah, semua orang ada hobi masing-masing :)

Lps ni ada cerita best. Tapi tak tau lah bila nak update. Gambar pun malas nak upload. Tengoklah nnt =='

I was never here to begin with

2011-07-04T09:09:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Just some random updates,

Hidup masih lagi busy. Perkara mungkin tak berjalan dengan lancar, tapi sekurang-kurangnya ia berjalan Daripada duduk di dalam takuk yang lama.

Bab Nutirion untuk Bio dah masuk part tumbuh-tumbuhan dan makanya dengan sebulat usaha aku berperang dengan syaitan yang asyik bergayut dekat mata. Kenapa tak belajar ruminant dengan non-ruminant jeh. Tak perlu lah tumbuh-tumbuhan ni~ Dan hari ni, tengok cross-section rabbit. Real punya, diawet dalam bekas. Fuu fuuu fuuu. I'll never look at rabbits the same again after this =='

Dan aku masih lagi terkedek-kedek membayar hutang. InsyaAllah langsai sebelum Ramadhan. Doakan aku. Bilangan hari sudah sedap didengar dan terasa mampu lah. Dari yang lepas, kena kira guna dua-dua tangan. Cheeeeee kam bak, bak kam cik <-- sangat tiba-tiba. Aku tauu -,-

K bai, luv u olz TIZ much!

Plese tell me what we had was real

2011-06-25T10:03:00.000-07:00

Assalamualikum :)

Usaha 3 minggu duduk diam di atas kerusi selama 2 jam lebih untuk satu paper akhirnya berbaloi. Aku score 7A yang pelbagai A nya, dan 3B. Alhamdulillah. Adddmath aku patutnya C tapi memandang PUAN Rahina baik, dia beri aku 3 markah bonus lantas menjadikan addmath aku B. Terima kasih puan. Walaupun saya tacing dengan puan sebab tukar kedudukan pelajar dalam kelas =='

Dan di sini saya nak utarakan sesuatu, dulu kalau tanya cita-cita, komfem2 punya lah DOKTOR! Komfem! Dan ya, aku suka subjek Bio. Lagi-lagi bab digestion tu. Serius suka. Tapi masalahnya, markah Akaun aku jauh lebih tinggi dari Bio. Sebelum ni pun. Membuatkan aku ragu-ragu untuk memilih jalan berdarah sebagai seorang doktor. Lagipun ramai cakap doktor ni susah. Makcik aku pun sangkut kat tahun ke-3.

Accounting tu suka, suka lah jugak. Tapi macam tak je. Tapi macam ya. Hmmm. Ayah dah plan untuk aku buka kedai bila aku besar nanti. Takpun ayah buka kedai, aku yang jaga. Ayah kata, lepas SPM kerja kat Chicken Rice Shop, belajar apa yang patut lepas tu buka cawangan baru. Inilah jadinya bila ada darah Cina dalam keturunan Encik Saffar. Senang hidupnya.

Tuntasnya, aku masih tak tahu arah tuju hidup aku. Kbai.

I know I'm not good enough

2011-06-23T05:03:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Another weekend 'well spent' with two most annoying human being ever existed :)

Yang sorang masa grocery shopping , asyik cakap "alahhh, yang RM1.49 ade, nak jugak yang Rm2.00! Beli yang murah jehh!" <--Syaf
Yang sorang lagi , "Yee kite nak mandi." 15 minit kemudian, "haaa, nak mandi la." 20 minit kemudian. Benda yang sama. <-- Hazirah
Yang sorang lagi , "Eh ayam goreng! Beli ayam goreng! Eh kek ni sedap tak? Eh, ehh, sushi ade? Ehh ehh, chicken popcorn tak beli? Eh ehh, beli Twister! Twister!" <-- Aku la ni -,-'

And I wish I could turn back times.

Do you believe it?

2011-06-11T22:39:00.000-07:00

Assalamualikum :)

I need a new desktop. A cheerful one. So this is my idea of cheerful :D
Btw, esok sekolah. Satu-satunya perkara yang mengembirakan adalah, aku mungkin boleh menguruskan badan dengan mendaki bangunan tiga tingkat untuk ke 4STA1. Doakan aku berjaya. Dan, doakan keputusan peperiksaan aku tidak begitu memalukan. Amin.

"Piagam Madinah dihidup dan dijana

Semua agama Ibrahim aman hidup bersama

Perang cuma tinggal kata dalam kamus lama

Tak disebut, Tak diguna

Tak lagi dicari makna" - Malique

Setiap kali aku dengar lagu ni, bulu roma aku meremang. Cuba Youtube, The Arrivals. Dokumentasi bersiri yang masih belum sempat aku habis tonton. Kadang-kadang seram sangat sampai aku terpaksa tangguhkan. Bukan cerita hantu, cuma satu kebenaran.

K bai.

Just Tonight

2011-06-11T08:32:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Memandangkan saya punya CS3 asyik tersekat-sekat kalau bukak. Sikit-sikit not responding. Pekak barangkali. Tak respond pada aku? Okay tu tak kelakar -,- Mana-mana jalan pun (anyway) , saya mengambil langkah drastik untuk buang CS3 (takde lah drastik mana sebenarnya. Delete file jeh sbb Photoshop nye portable.) dan download CS5. Beberapa percubaan pertama, kedua dan ketiga gagal untuk download. Internet connection meragam. Tetapi akhirnya berjaya.

Maka pada malam ini, saya bergitu teruja click sana dan sini. Barangkali dah lama tinggalkan Photoshop, kaku lah jugak. Dekat 15 minit cari button Action. Pfft. Jadi nak asah bakat yang dah berhabuk, edit lah gambar masa dekat Gunung Lambak. Muka yang minyak tu kasi licin. Kasi lembut. Kasi flawless sikit. Tu yang semua nampak mengancam.

"You say that you love rain, but you open your umbrella when it rains. You say that you love the sun, but you find a shadow spot when the sun shines. You say that you love the wind, but you close your windows when wind blows. This is why I am afraid, when you say that you love me too." - Tumblr.

K bai.

It never cross my mind

2011-06-10T23:17:00.000-07:00

Assalamualikum :)

Harapan aku musnah hancur berderai setelah aku berpenat lelah daki Gunung Lambak sampai ke puncak yang sangat tak lawo sebab ada construction tu, apabila makcik kesayangan aku cakap : "Ehhhh, Yaa da makin gemuk dah :DD"

=='

I not used to be this kind of person. Yang sibuk risau pasal berat badan. lemak tepu dan dagu dua. Mungkin zaman remaja. Kita nak sama dengan semua orang. Taknak ketinggalan. Tapi hell like I care. Konon je berkabung pipi makin tembam, makan laju jugak. Pagi-pagi sambar Kinder Bueno dulu. Petang minum air Pepsi. Janji nak exercise, ke laut jugak. Fuuu. Biarlah. Comel kan.

So, sekarang baru terkedek-kedek nak buat kerja rumah. Esok je tinggal. Ahad. Ape aku buat sepanjang cuti sekolah ni? *Bunyi cengkerik malam-malam* *Curtain falls and music fade away*

Psst, aku tak keluar bandar pun cuti ni. Ohemgee. Baiknya aku -,-' Dah Bai.

I do not know how it ends

2011-06-07T06:33:00.000-07:00

Pergi kedai pertama, casing handphone, RM 18, tapi warna merah dah habis stock. Pergi kedai kedua, casing handphone yang sama warna merah, RM 25, tak berbaloi lansung. Pergi kedai ketiga, casing yang sama warna merah, RM 15, tapi dah takde mood nak beli. Ape masalah dengan dunia? Casing yang sama tapi harga beza-beza. Sama jugak macam, cantik itu subjektif. Dia mungkin cantik bagi kau, tapi tak bagi aku. Apa kesinambungan? Aku pun tak tahu.

Dan maaf. Aku tau aku yang salah. K dah. Bai.

Deep down in my heart

2011-06-02T07:35:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Memandangkan saya malas nak berdikir barat panjang-panjang tentang PBB, saya terus lompat lompat lompat ke konklusi. Dan konklusi saya adalah ,

saya sayang KRSTK. Alhamdulillah, 4 tahun dalam KRSTK, setiap batch saya sayanggg. But maybe 2009 dan 2010 lagi mantap. Tapi tahun ni tak kurang hebatnya. Semua bagi kerjasama. Kecuali dua orang yang tak sangat. (Nampak tak bertapa spesifiknya aku ni) Tp aku tau, semua dah bagi yang terbaik. Aku mohon ampun sbb aku bukan ketua yang mampu dijulang-julang kehebatannya. Takde ape pun nak dimegahkan. Kalau takde Khalidah dan form 4 yang lain, kelaut lah aku jawabnya.

Tapi PBB kali ni takleh lupa. Sbb aku jumpa bakat baru, tiup bara api kasi nyala. Aku sorang dalam group yang berjaya buat ==' Dan juga bawa Fidah ke hospital malam-malam. Mungkin sebagai balas jasa dia bagi aku nasi goreng tomyam. Sumpah masa Fidah nangis dengan tangan bengkak, aku pun tahan je. Padahal dah tacing dah tu. Dr atas sampai bawah menggigil. Sebab serba sedikit benda tu salah aku. Hehe. Dahlah, yang penting PBB best. Saya sayang KRSTK P batch 2011 :)

Nanti dah ada gambar elok sikit, cek tukaq noo~

You might drown

2011-05-30T23:45:00.000-07:00

Now, my holiday really begin.
Chiao, nak mandi. Skrg pukul 02:58 pm =='

You puzzle like a jigsaw

2011-05-22T10:25:00.000-07:00

Assalamualikum :)

*I will try best to NOT post another melancholic and heart-throbbing or sappy post. Even I am disgusted =='

Hai haii. Otak saya dah tepu dengan nombor mole, avogadro constant, octet, duplet, halogens. Homigosh. Tak tau macam mana nak jawab paper esok. Tak sedia lansung! Dah lah minggu depan minggu sipi-sipi nak terjun bangunan.

Chemistry, Add Math, Biology and Physics.

Seriously. SERIOUSLY...

Dulu masa form 3, Science dapat 96 memang sumpah berlagak lah. Rasa aman je hidup. Tapi bila ketemu mitochondrion, inertia dan halogens... Rasa hidup ni tak adil. Haih. Saya patut tidur sekarang. Jam menunjukkan tepat 1:41 AM. Saya taknak tidur masa tengah jawab paper esok. Tak manis anak dara tidur masa buat exam (walaupun itulah yang aku buat selama dua minggu ni).

K bai. Mucho love, in case we won't meet again.

Nota kaki : THERE'S TOO MANY PINK IN MY BLOG! WAK HAPENG?!

You may never know

2011-05-18T08:26:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum.

Full stop. No smiley. Because I'm in a slanderous mode today. This is due to my stupidity for not answering a question that could give me 20 marks in Prinsip perakaunan which I knew perfectly well how to answer it. I know. I should just hang myself right now. I am a disgrace to those kaum who didn't wear spectacles. And yes. I am being hyperbola too. So kids, make sure. Read all the questions. AND ANSWER THEM.

Well, all that depressions leads to the new look on my Recycle Bin. All this is just a figment of your imagination. I'm going to alter the header because it looks really ugly since my creative side is not switched on and I am in a hurry. So yeah, I'm going to alter it, if I have time. AND ! If I am diligent enough to do it ==' As you can see, I've done some anjakan paradigma by choosing pink! Embrace it people. Because in the next 3 or 4 days, I'll replace the pink with black for sure.

Oh, here some tip. Be careful for what you write, you may never know who's reading.
JENGJENGJENGGG.

Leg note : In English mood today since I'm taking English paper tomorrow. This is a practice. See! Online-ing and blogging does have benefits :D

K. Bai.

Hating myself

2011-05-14T21:16:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Pada suatu pagi yang hening tatkala saya sedang study sivik (okay, tu tipu) , tiba-tiba ada adik manis nk jumpa saya. Adik manis tu bagi saya NASI GORANG TOMYAM. Saya jatuh cinta dekat adik manis tu. Makanya, Rafidah binti Mohd Yusof, jom couple ;D Sumpah terharu sebab dia suruh mak dia masakkan setuppperware penuh nasi goreng tomyam dan ikan goreng. Sikit lagi nak jatuh lah air mata ni. Nasib baik je aku ni tabah.

EHEHEHE :D

Tuntasnya di sini, kalau nak masuk meminang saya, hantarlah sekuali apa-apa yang berkenaan dengan tomyam. I'm a little bit too into tomyam. He might just be my second boyfriend, next to Nick Santino who just finished performing in Jakarta. And obviously, I'm hating the Jakarta-rians now =='

So, midyear exam. Given 2 hours and half yet still I can't finish answering the questions. My back starting to hurt and still got two weeks of that coming. Enduring this with much patience. This is my first time experience taking the exam, SPM style. Lower form, be prepared. It's not honeymoon being in form 4. Much less form 5. I swear my newly bought ink has ran out. And I've only been answering 10 papers. Oh okay, ten. =='

I know I am not prepared 'cause here I am sitting in front of the computer typing nonsense. My I-have-to-study-and-score-every-paper promise, had gone to where, still hasn't been identified. My GPS brain is not working. And yeah, I haven't revised much. Yet still got Bio and Chemist coming. Please Alyaa! Come to your senses!

Kbai. Going to drown myself in this shitloads of buku rujukan and buku latihan.

For the hundreth time

2011-05-07T16:46:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Aku senang percayakan orang. Mungkin sebab masa tu muka orang yang menipu tu, sungguh meyakinkan. Takpun dalam mesej, kata-kata dia terlalu berlagu pilu? Entah, tuntasnya, aku senang ditipu. Dan diperbodoh-bodohkan.

Bayangkan, bila kau bertanya status dengan orang yang kau sayang, dia balas satu character je dalam mesej. 'x'. Takde noktah takde koma. Bayangkan, orang yang kau sayang, sumpah pada kau dekat tepi pantai, yang dia takde marka. Tapi gedebak gedebuk, rupanya ada. Bayangkan bila kau call orang yang kau sayang, dia buat tak tau je. Layan macam layan kucing mintak makanan. Bayangkan bila orang yang kau sayang, tak contact kau utk beberapa lama. Aku sabar. Aku pujuk diri, kata ini dugaan Allah. InsyaAllah lepas ni, aku dapat nikmat lagi besar.

Selepas beberapa bulan, aku okay.
Aku dah dapat aku yang lama. Aku percayakan orang balik semula.
Aku kata, tak selamanya aku punya hadup sadis dan tragis macam ni. Aku butakan mata tengok orang lain happy, loncat-loncat pegang belon.

Aku mulakan hidup baru. Tapi,

Bayangkan bila kau dapat call dari kawan baik kau, dia maki hamun kau. Aku sabar. Aku terima balik kawan baik aku tu. Bayangkan bila kawan baik kau janji, dia takkan tinggalkan kau. Tapi bila dapat kekasih hati baru, dia pergi macam tu je. Aku sabar. Aku terima balik kawan baik aku tu. Bayangkan bila kawan baik kau kata, kau yang paling penting dalam hidup dia. Tapi, cepat je dia putus asa dengan kau. Bayangkan bila kawan baik kau janji, taknak ulang benda yang sama lagi dekat kau, tapi, dia tetap ulang. Berkali-kali.

Aku tak pernah mintak lebih dalam hidup ni. Aku penat kutip satu-satu hati yang terkeluar dari rib cage ni. Aku tampal guna gam gajah. Ura-ura mengatakan gam gajah ni kuat. Tapi rupanya tak pun.

Minggu ni nak exam. Aku taknak masa exan bm aku buat karangan pasal kau. Aku taknak masa sejarah, aku cerita sejarah kita. Aku nak fokus.

Kau suka hati buat apa yang kau suka dekat aku. Kau suka hati putus asa dengan aku. Kau suka hati pergi macam tu je. Kau kate kau takde siape? Bs. Kau kate kau sedih, menangis gila-gila? Bs. Kau kate kau simpan semua? Bs. Kau tak pernah fikir pasal aku kan? Kau tak fikir macam mana sakitnya hati aku kena maki dengan kau. Macam mana sakitnya hati aku kena tinggal macam tu je. Macam mana kau main buang aku. Macam mana kau datang balik, macam kononnya semua okay. Macam mana aku tengok kau tinggalkan janji yang kau dah buat, macam tu je. Macam mana kau buat yang aku ni tak wujud.

Terima kasih.
Terima kasih sebab for the god-knows-how-many-times, you break me.

Zero expectation

2011-05-03T09:07:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Sampai-sampai kat SMK Kota Jaya tu, rasa kerdil yang amat. Semua tak berani cakap lebih. First time kot pergi negeri. Dengan baju merah besauuu tu, konon buat muka berlagak macam dah 7 kali pergi negeri ==' Niat masa datang just nak timba pengalaman je. Fareez cakap, tengok budak-budak yang dah biasa pergi negeri macam mana. Cikgu Megat pun tak harap ape-ape. Apatah lagi kitorang.

Mungkin aku gugup lebih bila fikir tu peringkat negeri, sumpah aku banyak gila salah. Keluar baris, terus meratapi kebodohan diri sendiri. Dahlah sebelum kitorang tu juara bertahan, si SAKTI. Bila dengar diorang sebut Sains Kota Tinggi, semua dah cuakkkk. Aku lah tu antaranya.

Masa penyampaian sijil penyertaan, Kluang tak disebut. Al-makumlah, first time pergi negeri so tak tau protokol. Semua dah muka paise sebab ingat penganjur lupa daerah kitorang. Aku pun dah macam, heshhh. Sekali, ghupe-ghupe nye, yang tak dpt sijil penyertaan tu maksudnya dapat tempat. KEHKOHKAH. Dapat lah kitorang, Naib Johan dengan sijil penyertaan skali. Besar punya 'Naib Johan' dia tulis kt dlm sijil.

Tula, first time lagi pergi negeri, kan dah mcm orang jakun. Orang happy tak dpt sijil penyertaan masa dia sebut satu-satu, kitorang muka paise. HAHA. Nak sangat timba pengalaman, hambek kauu :P Anyway, Alhamdulillah sangat-sangat-sangat sebab dapat Naib Johan. Usaha kami berbaloi. Paid off. Kami datang dengan zero expectation, tapi balik bawak kejayaan. Siapa yg tak suka :)

Something about you

2011-04-30T06:45:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

HOH ! Kualiti gambar tak berapa elok. S punya hengpongg =='

ALHAMDULILLAH, Johan Kawad Kaki Daerah Kluang 2011.

Dua tahun berturut-turut :)

Tahniah KRSTK! :DD

Usaha kita berbaloi. Untuk negeri kita buat yang terbaik jeh. Kalau ada rezeki, dapat lah. Kalau takde, ini sebagai pengalaman pertama. Korang suprises even myself :)

Tahniah jugak buat Polis Lelaki dan Perempuan. Komander Polis Lelaki. Pengakap 01 STK dan komander Pengakap. PPI STK dan komander PPI. Komander KRSTK Lelaki. Piala pusingan 2011 milik kita :) Kita dah buat yang terbaik.

nota kaki : jadah blogger ni interface baru mcm harem jadah!

nota kuku kaki : untuk hari ini, saya sangat menyayangi Nur Khalidah binti Mahmud. Sebab dia merealisasikan impian saya. Hoahhh! Sayang cakk :DD

K BAI.

Life was easier then

2011-04-22T06:16:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Life was much more easier when were just bunch of kids saying I love you at random people with no meaning. Life was much more easier when we can talk all we want yet no one will make stupid assumptions or banned me to even look at you. Life was much more easier when I don't have to distance myself with you. Life was much more easier, when we don't care. Yet, life was not easy. I miss you. No more no less, no flowery words or bombastic sentence. Just plain and stupid,
I miss you.

Lama tak menaip, jadi rasa gian pulak. Lagipun online guna henfon. Mana nak update blog. Follower pun dah kurang satu. KAHKAHKAH. But, hell like I care. Aku pun rasa nak unfollow blog aku sendiri. Annoying bapak ==' Act, aku tgh cuak gila skrg ni. Dan sangat merindui KRSTK batch 2009 dan 2010.

Rindu nak main laga bontot dgn kak Sas, dengar Aliaa gelak, berlatih hormat dgn Kak Naffiz, nangis tengah padang, kiwi boot sambil gelak, dengar cerita hantu time nak tidur sekolah, main lawan tepuk dengan pengakap. Banyak sgt benda dah berubah. Perasaan hormat sesama sendiri hilang. Semangat pun makin kurang. Ruginya tak hargai benda yang dulu nampak mcm selekeh dan menyakitkan hati. Terima kasih ya Allah sbb kau beri aku peluang untuk lalui semua tu :)

Post aku semua tacing-tacing kan? Tu jerawat penuh kat muka. Pfft. K la, kang tacing lagi ada yg skrin laptop pecah sbb annoyed sangat. K dah bai.

As we grow up

2011-04-10T00:39:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Kalau dulu, dapat B dlm exam pun rasa mcm dunia tu tak adil sungguh. Rasa dah menyumpah seranah diri sendiri. Tp ini, add math dapat 48 rileks je. Result pelbagai. Dari A sampai D ade. Kalau dulu mcm ni, ayah dah belasah habis-habisan. Skrg? Haihh, JADAH kau ni Alyaa ==' Aku nak bagi alasan diri dkt sendiri yg aku tgh sangat tak betul masa minggu exam. Dengan balik secara mengejut dan pelbagai lagi lah hal lain yg menggugat iman.

Tp aku tau ini salah aku dan aku blh buat yang lebih baik. Seminggu tu mmg aku tak ulangkaji ape-ape. Jadi InysaAllah kalau aku betul-btul pegang buku, baca segala. Aku boleh dpt lagi baik dari ini. Form 4 gaya dah lain. Ingat tu. Kalau form 3 dulu, malam sebelum exam baca buku tu kira lumrah. Ni kalau Bio dgn Chemist terkedek-kedek baca malam tu jugak, mahu tak tepu otak kau.

Kesimpulannya, saya sayang STK. Kau kawan yang baik nak nasihat kan. Tapi kau tak tau cerita sebenar. Daripada kau bazirkan masa risau pasal orang lain dan bercakap tentang perkara yg kau tak tau, baik tak payah. Nampak tak takde kesinambungan lansung? K bai =='

I wish I was what you wanted

2011-04-04T05:25:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

2 April, kawad dalaman STK. Malangnya, KRSTK (P) gagal mempertahan kejuaraan tahun lepas dan tahun sebelumnya. Dah memang salah kami. Semua dah bongkak dengan diri sendiri, semua pandang remeh benda ni. Bila kalah baru terkedu. InysaAllah, untuk daerah kita boleh buat lebih baik lagi. Aku percaya pada kita :)

Tiba-tiba teringat hadiah hari jadi aku yang ke-8. Pembaris hijau dibalut dgn pembalut Telekom. Aku rindu kawan baik aku. Tiba-tiba teringat anak ikan dua ekor yang meninggal pada 23 Januari 2011. Aku rindu kawan baik aku. Aku sekarang nak pandang muka korang pun malu. Maaf sebab, salah aku kita dah tak rapat. Aku rindu Fadd, Aku rindu Syaz ;'(

Orang takkan faham. Kenapa aku balik STK. Bila kadang-kadang aku beritahu perkara sebenar, orang pandang lain. Orang betah balik. Dah tak ada guna. Aku dah dekat sini. Aku dah tak boleh patah balik. Apa guna kau judge aku? Apa guna kau yg frust lebih? Aku menyampah. Bila aku beritahu yg pelajaran kat sana lain, orang marah aku.

Baik tak payah tanya. Aku tak rasa kat sana aku blh belajar. Aku tak rasa aku kt sana akan bahagia. Bayangkan, purata aku gelak sehari adalah, 3 kali. Dari pagi sampai malam. Itu pun sebab ada Aida, Amirah, Azeerah dengan Bahiyah. Aku jenis tk pandai susun masa dn perlu muzik. Dkt sana MP3 pun dilarang. Masa terhad. Koko pun aku tak dpt kejar sbb aku second intake. Jawatan pun aku penat nak kejar. Banyak sangat benda nak handle dlm satu masa. Aku pun tk terdetik nak jadi pengawas. Banyak kerja. Aku tgk pengawas dkt sana busy. Semua diorang urus sendiri.

Maaf aku bukan jenis bodek senior untuk naik dekat sana. Maaf aku tk blh nak "sorry" bagai nak rak sampai boleh featuring dengan Super Junior. Maaf kat sana aku terlalu ngantuk sampai kan apa yg aku dpt tgkp dlm kelas adalah, "Assalamualikum Cikgu" dan "Terima kasih, cikgu." sahaja. Koko pun berterabur. Daripada aku tak dpt apa-apa kat sana baik aku balik sini.

Hani dan Khaliqah maybe boleh endure dekat sana. Tp bukan aku. Mungkin ini limit aku. Memang, aku mengalah cepat. Sbb aku taknak tunggu lama-lama. Emak ckp jgn paksa diri. Lagi membazir kalau tak dpt apa-apa lansung. Aku dah puas malukan mak ayah aku. Aku dah serik bazirkan duit diorang. Bagi ruang aku nak berubah. Jangan buat aku tension bila aku balik pun jadi masalah dan orang pandang aku mcm aku PERLU balik SESERI. Aku tau certain people cakap aku bazirkan peluang. Cakap aku ni coward. Sikit pun aku takleh tahan. Cakap aku homesick dan rindu sangat dekat mak.

Up to you. Maaf sebab aku tak boleh puaskan hati semua orang.

Naked truth

2011-03-27T03:14:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Kepulangan aku ke STK menimbulkan banyak tanda tanya. Orang tanya kenapa pindah balik, aku cakap aku rindu diorang. Mungkin pada diorang benda tu main-main. Tp aku jujur. Keadaan di STK berlipat kali ganda lebih baik dari dekat sana. Pembelajaran. Kawan-kawan di STK pun jauh lebih baik. At least tiada yg fake. Maaf cakap.

Aku taknak cerita panjang pun sebab musabab kenapa aku berpatah balik. Sbb korang hanya akan judge. Korang hanya akan cakap "hek eleehh". Sbb aku tau, aku pun judge diri sendiri. Aku rasa insyaAllah bila aku pilih nak pulang balik ke STK, aku buat pilihan yang betul. Aku dah susahkan ramai orang, buang banyak duit. InsyaAllah. Aku dah janji pada diri sendiri, nak berubah. Doakan aku.

Tp andai kata, takdir Allah, aku terpaksa pulang ke SESERI, insyaAllah aku akan terima dan cuba. Aku bukan redha. Tp putus asa.


Things I will miss in SESERI. Epidendrium satu, bacaan sebelum tidur dan solfa, akak-akak dan budak dorm, public phone dan surau :)

"You know my name, not my story. You know what I've done, not why it is done. You know where I've been, but not what I've been through."

Remember all the pain

2011-03-15T05:36:00.000-07:00

Sesungguhnya Allah sedang menguji kita.

It feels so long

2011-03-12T06:18:00.000-08:00

Assalamualikum :)

Saya sudah pulang. 2 minggu lepas adalah minggu paling annoying dan paling menyeksakan dalam hidup aku. Jangan pelik kalau naik cuti ni, nampak aku dekat Sekolah Tinggi Kluang balik. 4 Eliara dan Epidendrium 1, jangan rindu aku =='

Mirror, mirror on the wall

2011-02-26T16:39:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Maaf kerana saya mengupdate blog dengan rakus nya dalam masa dua hari ni. Inilah jadinya bila semangat patriotik cintakan blog mula muncul. Dan kesinambungan dari post saya yang lepas berkenaan dengan saya mengambil lesen, ( sila rujuk I know it's bad when all I can think of is you ) Jadi makanya, lesen pun dah siap. Lalu timbul rasa riak untuk menunjukkan lesen saya. Biasalah, budak jakun.


THUMBS UP ! (Y)

Tiba-tiba teringat detik-detik bersama Goh Wei Pin lepas baca blog Hazirah. Goh Wei Pin, insan yang mempunya 4 orang adik beradik yang semuanya bersekolah di sekolah lain-lain. Gemar bermain basketball dan selalu duduk di kelas masa rehat. Untuk bingkisan yang lebih mendalam, sila rujuk Newsy Ad-Lib.

Satu :

Alyaa : Goh, rumah awak ade langsir?
Goh Wei pin : Cheee! Ade lah!
Alyaa : Taklah, biasa mak saya cakap Chinese dulu-dulu, tak pakai langsir or karpet. Ha! Rumah awak ade karpet?
Goh Wei Pin : Takde. Karpet mahal kan?!
Alyaa, Hazirah, Syaf : HAHAHAHAHA :'D

Kemudian,

Goh Wei Pin : Garden lah! Garden! *sambil ketuk-ketuk meja buat muka geram*

Dan lagi,

Goh Wei Pin : Saya kan, kalau cakap dengan cikgu, nanti saya macam ni *tunjuk tangan menggigil*

Apa lagi ya?

Goh Wei Pin : Nah, satu untuk awak, satu untuk Hazirah, *sambil hulur Ferro Roche* ambil je, jangan guna ayat hiperbola.

OH YA,

Hazirah : Rumah awak mesti besar kan. Ade swimming pool tak?
Goh Wei Pin : Takde, tapi saya ade bath tub. *Dengan berlagaknya*

The infamous Ferro Roche! Thanks Goh Wei Pin ♥

Palng tak boleh lupa masa cerita makan pakai apa. Dan cerita pasal rumah dia kat mana. Masa Goh nak tukar baju PJ. Sebenarnya, semua tak boleh lupa. Haihh, Goh Wei Pin ni, buat orang sedih pulak ==' K la, Bai.

A piece of me

2011-02-26T09:58:00.000-08:00

Dear Syafiqqa Shaqqira Ibrahim,

Aku sayang kau. Double triple. Infinity. Aku minta maaf sebab pindah. Kalau aku tak dapat tawaran tu, barangkali aku dah couple dgn Goh Wei Pin sekarang dan masa kahwin nanti, kau jadi pengapit aku. Hazirah basuh pinggan kat dapur. Barangkali.

Macam kau cakap, semua ni ada hikmah. Allah nak uji persahabatan kita bertiga. Kalau ade jodoh, ada usaha, InsyaAllah kita kawan sampai bila-bila. Aku percaya kat kau. Aku tau yang kau kuat. Kau pandai bawa diri. Aku tau kau pandai. Add math kau bebel sambil buat pun lajuu je aku tengok. Jaga diri tau. Nangis je takpe. Aku benarkan kau buat Sinetron Indon. Jangan kan Indon, Kanada pun aku tak kesah Syaf.

Kenapa? Sebab kau kawan baik aku. Dan aku sayang kau. Ingat tu.Aku selalu doakan yg terbaik utk kau.

Lepas ni, nanti satu suara hilang kalau aku nyanyi lagu Melukut di Tepi Gantang, Cinta Sakti, Bidadari, Grenade. Orang KL nyanyi lagu Taylor Swift, Bunkface whatsoever. Taste lagu kita dahlah pelik-pelik. Mana aku nak cari kawan mcm kau? Lepas ni, nanti satu suara hilang kalau aku gelak dengan Hazirah kalau ada lawak-lawak bodoh, masa-masa high. Ramai orang ingat aku sedih sebab takut kita dah tak kawan.

Tapi sebenarnya kau sedih sebab kalau aku datang pagi, aku tak jumpa kau. Aku tak duduk sebelah kau. Aku tak dengar lagi orang sebut nombor satu-satu masa buat kira-kira. Aku sedih sebab takde lagi orang nak menggedik pasal Hafiz lah, Wan lah. Siapa entah lagi. Aku sedih sebab a piece of me is missing. Aku sayang kau. Jangan pernah lupa tu.

From my heart with love

2011-02-26T09:24:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum :)
Sebelum apa-apa, maafkan aku sbb aku tak kuat. maafkan aku sebab orang sekeliling aku tak berapa nak kuat lalu menjadikan aku juga tak seberapa nak kuat. Maafkan aku sebab buat kau rasa annoyed. Maafkan aku sebab aku menyampah dekat kau. Maafkan aku. Aku dengan kau tak banyak beza. Cuma kau fkir, diri kau better than others. More innocent and everything. Tu aku malas nak cakap lebih. Sekali lagi, maafkan aku.

Dear Syazwani Zakaria,

Awak, saya sayang awak! Terima kasih Syaz sebab selalu ceramah dkt aku. Selalu tolong aku. Selalu ada dengar aku bebel. Selalu ada time aku nangis. Terima kasih sebab selalu gelak dengan aku. Terima kasih banyak-banyak. Kau kawan baik dan kakak aku. Jasa kau pada aku bertimbun. Lps ni, kalau kita dah tak rapat, tu salah aku. Tp InsyaAllah, ada jodoh kita kawan sampai bila-bila. Terima kasih Syaz. Aku sayang kau. Sangat-sangat. Nanti balik cuti kita rempit tau. Aku dah ada lesen L :)

Doakan aku berjaya kat sana, aku doakan kau berjaya untuk SPM, Aminn :)

Dear Faddly Hanaffie Jeffry,

Saya sayang awak. Dari darjah satu dulu, sampai sekarang dan InsyaAllah sampai bila-bila. Awak kawan baik saya, kekasih gelap saya, musuh saya, semua lah. Terima kasih sebab selalu dengar masalah saya. Kita gaduh-gaduh pun, baik balik kan? Jodoh kuat tu. HAHA. *Sorry Kak Naffiz. Dekat sini, jaga diri tau Fadd, perangai tu jaga, kesihatan tu lagi lah! Jaga hati mak ayah awak. Dan, jaga Syaf untuk saya.

Saya sayang awak, ingat saya selalu eh :)

Dear Goh Wei Pin,

I love you! Kehkehkeh. Sorry for disturbing you and Andrew non-stop at school. Sorry for all the stupid and ridiculous questions I've asked. But I have fun sitting in front of you. Turned out you're a very funny guy. Well, not so much 'cause you don't have a swimming pool :P Jaga diri ya Goh Wei Pin. Jangan layan Azzura, nanti saya jealous! Layan Chin Wee Ni takpe. Saya sokong! Thanks for all the laugh, I'll miss you lah Goh Wei Pin !

Dear 4STA1 students and Amira Syahira and Kahrishmaa and Loges and others,
I'll miss you guys!

I know it's bad when all I can think of is you

2011-02-23T04:51:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum!

So, aku sekarang sedang menunggu lesen L. Bagi motor. Tolong percaya kerana ini kisah benar. Jadi bagaimana saya yang tak tahu menunggang motor ini mampu dapat L? Ye, kerana saya ada affair dgn abang yg ajar say tuh. KAHKAHKAH =='

Mane ade, aku penat campur semput naik motor mak Athirah dkt Taman ape ntah aku tak ingat. Dahlah berat nak pengsan. Lepas tu mana ada jadi tontonan umum! Dah lah first time try tunggang motor! Petang-petang pulak tu. Penduduk kt situ semuanya mengamalkn gaya hidup sihat, petang-petang keluar rumah menghirup udara segar. Aku yg dok practice dkt tmn permainan tu, semua tgk. Ramai kot yg tolong gelakkan. nasib baik aku jatuh sekali jeh. Pergh, muka tembok je masa tu. Memberansangkan bukan? .

Dan dengan berlagaknya, esok terus try motor utk 3 jam lesen L. Tak tunggang dlm litar je, pusing-pusing kt luar dgn abang agas <3 Kena gelak lagi dgn calon kat situ. Sbb brek mcm haram. Muka tembok lagi. Navin pun gelakkan sebab aku tak masuk litar. Dh kukuh betul dah tembok muka aku ni. Pusing-pusing dekat luar dekat sejam (padahal tempah 2 jam) bersama abang agas tersayang <3then balik.

Esoknya lagi, datang, tinggal habiskan sejam. Several rounds luar litar, lepas u ayah suruh masuk dlm litar. Perghh, masa tu, gua dah tensi dgn litar. Mana lah ade kecik. Aku nk selekoh-selekoh mcm harem kot. Sila beri perhatian yang bahawasanya saya tak pandai tunggang motor dan masih belum stabil. Namun bergitu, number of fall, none! Alhamdulillah. Tp ade la sekali, nk terjatuh. Tp abang agas <3 cepat-cepat lari tolong. Then dapat lah lesen L. Senang bukan? DODOL, senang jadah =='

Ini akademi memandu mne pnye litar entah. BESAR! Kan senang sikit! Ngah ni kan!

Lepas ni 9 jam 1/2 utk lesen P lepas tu test JPJ. Ini real punya. Tk blh main tipu tunggang luar litar jeh. InsyaAllah boleh, Alyaa :) Dah tu je aku nak cite pasal aku naik motor. Tak suke sudah. Aku bukan buat sinetron Indonesia pun.

Psst, ingat Jumaat ni nk bwk motor pergi lthn kawad, masalahnya motor pun takde. Kereta pun byk kt jln raya, asyik parents aku bagi bwk. K DAH BAII.

The only time you think about me? Never.

2011-02-14T05:29:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Sakit hati aku, kau mane pernah kesah kan? Yg malu bkn kau, tapi aku. Ikhlas tak ikhlas aku, kau ape kesah. Malu tak malu aku, kau ape kesah. Kau mmg kena berlagak pun dgn aku. Lps tu mmg kau kena yakinkan kawan baik kau pun yg cerita pasal aku. Kau nk ape dr aku sebenarnya? Kau yg pilih nk pergi kan Tiba-tiba kau buat mcm aku pulak yg cari pasal dgn kau.

Lepas tu, masa mcm ni, kau nk ngendeng dgn Cinta Hati aku. Dia tu annoying tahap kau rase nk terjun BCB kot. Nak jugak comel-comel, rapat-rapat. Berapa ramai je blh tahan dgn die. Setiap hari ddk sebelah dia, ruang meja, kepak tgn semasa menulis pun jadi isu besar kot. Tp aku tetap syg die. Kau mmg nak ambik sorang-sorang dr aku kan. Ambik lah, ambik. Lgpun aku dh sampai pesanan-pesanan terakhir dah dkt Cinta Hati aku. Kira mcm guideline bile dia dgn kau.

Hidup ni kelakar kan kadang-kadang, mcm Ali yg melaburkan modal dlm perniagaan nya sendiri, perniagannya dianggap berhutang dgn Ali. Ataupun, osmosis adalah active transport walaupun pergerakannya dr low concentration to high concentration. Ade kena mengena dgn cerita td. Takde kan? Aku tau. Mmg paling kuat merepek, aku la kan. 8 buah laptop lah aku kuat merepek. *Ayat kena rempit sikit. Kena buat org rasa aku ade masalahh politik dgn diorang.

K. Tu je nk emo-emo sikit. Bebaii.
Psst! Saya rindu adik saya, 'Ainaa ;'(

This is it right?

2011-02-06T06:02:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum :) Maaf kerana blog ini dlm mood berkabung untuk beberapa ketika. Hidup tengah terumbang-ambing skrg ni. Nk buat mcm mne. Maaf jika mood anda turut terganggu.

Gambar ihsan dr Google.

Anyways, hari ni aku pergi Kursus KPP selama 7 jam. Ye, saya amat berlagak nk ambil lesen motor B2. Tp satu fakta, saya tak pernah sekali pun bawa motor. Dn tentunya lah kan saya memang tak pandai pandu motor. Segala jenis motor. Jadi? Bagaimana? Teori kau boleh lah, praktikal nnt? Mahu tak terkentut-kentut nk pandu motor tu. Dahlah jurulatih cerita ada yg masuk longkang yg masuk mane. Ape lah nasib aku nnt =='

Gambar ihsan dr Google.

Dan panjang lebar serta ketat jugak eh peraturan die. Betul kena 42/50 utk ujian undang-undang. Tak bagi signal perlahan, tk toleh belakang, gagal terus. Melainkan anda ada affair dgn jurulatih JPJ. Kau ade? Haih, berapa kali ujian lah baru aku lulus nk pandu motor agaknya. Ceyt! Motor pun takde! Abg aku lah ni, tamak. Semua nk bawak pergi Perak. Motor, kereta. Patkal kitorang tkde bot.

Bertukar ke topik sekolah, this is it kan? Naik sekolah ni, aku duduk tempat Hariz. 'Ainaa dah takde belakang aku. lepas ni kena pinjam homework bdk baris sebelah/depan la. Dulu pinjam 'Ainaa je kerjanya. Lepas ni, dah tk blh mkn roti Hariz lagi. Dh tk boleh nganjing Santos lagi. Dah tk blh kacau Segon lagi. Tk boeh main tegur-tegur kat luar kelas dgn Hani dan Aliaa. Lps ni dh tk blh kacau Izzat. This is it kan? Haih, I love you guys ;'( *lap air mata*tipu je sebenarnya*

K bebaii.

This is cliche but , if only I can turn back time.

2011-02-03T03:15:00.000-08:00

Kesinambungan dr blog PENCIL ;

The fun and loving STK doesn't exist anymore.

I wish the new building wasn't build. I wish we weren't in one session. I wish none of us transfer anywhere. I wish teachers doesn't keep on saying "Awak kan 4STA1". I wish we don't have to drop any subject. I wish I'm in 2010, 3RK1. I wish I'm in Pangkor right now for my end year trip. I wish.

I'm letting go because I love you

2011-01-29T18:20:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum ;(

'Ainaa, nnt lepas ni kite nak merepek dgn spe? Kite nk kacau sape? Kte nk tau update bdk aspuri dr mne? Kalau kite tk siap kerja? Kite nk tiru sape punye? Ingat tak, mase form1 dgn form2 rapat gila kan, dgn Pini lagi? Pergi mane2 semua same2. Akhir tahun mcm org gila tangkap gambar. Patu nnt gosip pasal bdk asrama. Kat sane awk ade sume tu? Ade ape? Gajah je? Haihh. Kite syg awak. Awk kwn kite yg paling siuman. Lepas ni kite gerenti rindu awk. Sbb kite syg awk, kite doakan awk berjaya kay kat sane ;)

Hani, Aliaa, haihhhhhh. Walaupun skrg tk rapat sgt, rasa tau hilang something. Kite syg korang yg otak sangat tak centre ni. Syg tk dpt peluk Aliaa, sempat peluk Hani je. Jaga diri kat tempat baru. Org kt sini jgn lupa. Kite doakan kejayaan korang eh :)

Lepas ni dpean aku kosong semua. Takde lagi Hariz, Segon, Haikal yg selalu kitorang kacau. Panggil Santos lah, Tunku lah. Rindu tau? Lps ni, spe nk cite pasal gitar dgn camera dgn aku kalau bukan Hariz? Haihh, Tkde lg dh termenung pndg belakang Hariz kalau bosan cikgu mengajar. Tga tahun sekelas. Baru tahun ni nak rapat, semua nak pergi. Lps ni mana ada korang jumpa jiran belakang yg banyak membebel dan nyanyi lagi jiwang. Takde kan? Haihh, jaga diri eh semua, aku tkde kt sane nk halang budak buli korang. Aku blh sampaikan doa je. Jd, semoga berjaya :)

*Ini first time korang bg benda mcm ni. Ckp syg kitorng pulak tu. Super duper terharu!

We can't help but look back and reminisce

2011-01-25T00:48:00.000-08:00

Memperkenalkan! Syazwani Zakaria Junior. Ngehngehngehh :DD

Lima tahun. Kalau aku pandang kau, aku selalu bangga. Aku suka tgk kau pakai baju sukan dan seluar sukan. Aku suka tgk muka tension kau bila kau nak lari. Aku suka tgk kau time kau warm-up. Aku suka tgk kau ddk bwk khemah sbb kaki kau cramp. Aku suka tgk muka berlagak kau lps kau dah menang. Aku suka tgk tangan kau bila kau pakai jam. Tu aku sedih bila kau kata kau nk give up olahraga.

Tp aku tak suka bila kau selalu takde dkt sekolah. Aku tak suka bila kau 24 jam busy sampai kau lupa aku. Kau lupa nak mesej tanya khabar. Kau lupa nak call tnye aku dah makan belum. Aku tak suka bila org bawak balik cerita, kau usha org lain. Aku tak suka bila aku tau org yg suka kau, selalu dkt dgn kau. Lima tahun. Aku bangga dgn kau.

Tp sekarang takde dah. Aku tak rasa bangga, aku tak rasa sedih, aku tak rasa happy. Aku tak boleh. Tak dibenarkan. Kalau aku bagi diri aku utk terus rasa mcm tu. Aku komfem tak boleh berhenti. Aku kena bergerak ke depan sbb kau dah lama tinggalkan aku dkt belakang. Kau dah bahagia. Aku belum lagi.

Masa aku belum sampai, itu yg aku selalu bgtahu dkt diri sendiri. Dan itu betul. Mungkin Allah ada rancangan lain utk aku. Mana tahu jodoh dgn Yusri nnt? Dpt makan Pizza Thai Seafood tiap-tiap hari. Jadi dekat sini, aku tinggalkan kau pulak. Walaupun aku lari lansung tak setanding dgn kau, aku akan jalan je. Takde ape nak diburu-buru kan. Lgpun aku lari 5 minit dah semput mcm baru lepas pusing satu Kluang.

Aku tak pernah bgtau org lain pasal benda ni. Tp hari ni, aku bgtau semua follower aku. Semua pembaca blog ni. Gila market kan? Sampai mesti ada yg salah faham. Aku takde niat lain. Cuma saje luahkan ape yg aku rase aku nk luahkan. Sebarang kontrovesi harap dielakkan. Ya, aku mmg bajet mcm dah menang ABPBH utk 6 tahun berturut-turut dan dah hasilkan 4 album.

Aku takde pasang niat utk pergi blk dgn kau. Lansung. Sbb aku tak boleh paksa takdir. Aku dah janji aku nak doakan kau. Jd aku akan doakan. Skrg masa utk bljr! Add math dgn BM aku tak sempat hantar hari ni. Kurang faham dan kurang masa merupakan faktor. Ape nak jadi?

It's a day well spent

2011-01-24T05:22:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum :)

So on my birthday which is 23rd of Jan, I woke up early in the morning to find my house been decorated for a party. Outside, Nick Santino had been standing with his guitar and alluring smile. As soon as our eyes met, he sang me Baby Blue Eyes but clearly, mine is pure black. But really. Who cares.

Then lunch, I had Pizza Hut. With Yusri - my crush since forever - and on on this very day, he noticed me and somehow maybe saw the birthsay girl aura floating above me. He decided to take a break from his job to accompany me. We had Seafood Marinara with Kupang instead of udang yg sikit gila tu.

Dinner, it was romantic. with Nishikido Ryo. As the clock make it way to 12 am of 24th Jan, we cried as my bithday is coming to it's end. But it's okay since Mamad need to celebrate his birthday too. No need to elaborate in riddicolous detail, just that, it's a day well spent.

No I don't stay at home finishing my homework with Syafiq texting me all day long. No, my parents don't get angry at me, at all today. No people doesn't piss me off today. I just had the perfect birthday.

A new road

2011-01-18T04:20:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum

Hani dapat Seri Puteri. Khaliqah pun.
Kecik dapat SASER. Hazim Rosman pun.
Aliaa dapat SAMURA, sape lg yg dpt?
Izzatul dapat SMSJ *yg guling-guling boleh sampai.
Segon dapat SBP dekat Perak. *Jom?

Aku? Ha-ha -,-'

Aku takde lah bermati-matian nk duduk asrama. Cuma nak rasa je mcm mana kehidupan kt sana. Tgk abg2 mcm best jeh. *Dan abg aku bace blog ni. HAI! XD Tp bila tak dpt tawaran, sedih pulak. Rasa sikit tersisih, Yg si Syaf, pergi kalau dpt Melaka je. Sbb nk dekat dgn Akmal Hafiz. Hazirah? Nk tggl STK sbb ada Tikas.

Aku? Ha-ha -,-'

Aku rase dh takde ape utk aku dekat STK. Maksud aku, sekolah tahun ni mcm bosan jeh. Aku sayang KRS. Aku sayang STK, sayang dekat kawan-kawan jugak tapi, entah. Rasa nak pindah, rasa taknak. Mak ayah galakkan tinggal STK. Abg kata pergi asrama. Kwn-kwn yg dpt tawaran muka mmg mcm dh tknk tggl STK kan.

Aku? Ha-ha -,-'

Mungkin rezeki aku dekat sini. Mungkin ini balasan tak dengar ckp ayah masa letak jawatan pengawas dulu. InsyaAllah, kat mana-mana je blh belajar. Cuma dkt STK, hati tu terseksa sikit. Lps ni bdk MRSM pulak dpt keputusan. AKu tak mohon. Tp sedih tgk sorang-sorang pergi. Haih, dah la. Baii.

I speak sarcasm

2011-01-15T16:37:00.000-08:00

Antara benda paling kejam yg kita blh buat kat seseorang selain cucuk pisau dekat dada dia adalah, mempergunakan seseorang tu. Makanya duduk nya saya di depan komputer ini adalah utk mengucapkan ribuan terima kasih kpd sesiapa yg telah mempergunakan aku :)

Dulu, terhegeh-hegeh ngendeng dkt aku. Ckp ini itu. Bila yg sorang tu dah dtg, pandang muka pun taknak. Ada, still ngendeng, tp ngendeng tak ikhlas. Just out of sympathy. Dude? Seriously? Manusia, manusia. pentingkan diri sendiri.

Mestilah ada rasa sakit hati dn senyap-senyap doa dia dpt balasan. Biar dia rasa mcm mana sakit hati yg aku rasa. Tp tk baik doakan keburukan org lain. Nak duduk diam, makin panas hati, panas punggung. Jadi apa yg perlu kite buat? Sabar je. *Duduk diam la tu kan? Pfft.

Aku takkan mintak kau mohon maaf kat aku. Aku tak mintak kau suddenly mesej aku. Aku tak mintak kau pura-pura ambil berat pasal aku balik. Aku tak mintak pun semua tu. Sbb lps kau dah gunakan aku, kau happy kan? Alhamdulillah. Ade la sikit sumbangan aku. Kau kawan aku. Somewhere between that line, I still love you walaupun kau kawan tak seberapa berguna dn aku pun tak pasti sama ada aku bolah panggil kau 'kawan' ke tak.

Dah tu je. Emo kejap.

Bai :)

Just saying

2011-01-10T05:58:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Saya pelajar STK dalam kelas 4STA1. Saya balik pukul 4 pada hari Isnin dan pukul 3.40 pada hari berikutnya kecuali Jumaat dan... entah saya tak ingat. Saya duduk sebaris dgn Hazirah dan Syaf (Yelah, saya nk geng dgn sape jeh slain mreka ni). Saya gerun sekelas dgn Andrew dan pelajar-pelajar lain sbb saya terasa sedikit dungu apabila mereka masih ingat Sejarah yg kami belajar masa Form 1 padahal saya tak ingat ape-ape dah.

Kalau dulu balik 1.50 petang , high gila. Sekarang, bila fikir balik lewat je, masing-masing dah malas nk high. Mungkin belum dpt sesuaikan diri sengan jadual waktu yg mencengkam serta menusuk kalbu ni. Tunggulah seminggu dua lagi, mungkin pil kuda pun tak dpt buat kami lebih high -,-'

Saya juga sekarang makin comel. Bawak bekal pergi sekolah, sbb rasa terbeban nk jalan pergi kantin dan bersesak-sesak. Tp part ni Syaf mungkin lebih comel sbb dia bawak bekas bekal yg ada tiga compartment dan gambar tomato kartun kat depan. Aku bwak yg jenama Tupperware je. Matang lah katakan. PFFT.

Dah tu je. Gambar dlm Hafiz Syaf.

P/s: Hafiz tu nama camera Syaf. Gedik, saya tahu.

One can only be strong for so long

2011-01-01T06:30:00.000-08:00

It's the first day of 2011 and I already feel like crap and obviously there will be another 355 days coming. Praying like hell that things will be fine. Again. And I, I will hurt less as the day passes by. This is rather melancholia. Unfortunately, I don't care.

Ciao.

Everything, restart!

2010-12-31T07:56:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum !

Tiba-tiba rasa membuak-buak nk menaip-naip new post sbb baru lepas baca-baca (nmpk tk smgtnya smpai semua jd kata ganda?) blog Newsy Ad-lib atau pun lbh di kenali sebagai blog budak bibir lapis. Ya, akhirnya identiti dia diketahui -,- (wtf?)

Yes, entry terakhir untuk tahun 2010. Seriously tahun ni adlh tahun yg plg aku sedih nk tinggalkan. Kalau dulu, lantak kau lah nak 1997 ke, 2003 ke. Honestly, aku pun tk tau kenapa sedih sgt. Maybe aku belajar banyaaaaak benda kot. Okay, mungkin korang tk nmpk beza tp aku tau , I'm not the same person I am last January. (Anggap lah skrg ni dh dgr bunyi bunga api. Dah 1 Jan 2011 walaupun pd hakikatnya baru pukul 11.46)

Sorry babe but don't you cry tonight, aku tak smbut thn baru. Last aku sambut masa aku masih hingusan lagi. Masa tu jln kaki dgn abg2 tercinta pegi Dataran Tasik tu pakai gelang yg menyala-nyala (aku punya wrna pink -,-) sambil dengar kumpulan New Boyz nyanyi. Bila fikir balik rasa loser pulak. I pun dunu whaiii lah kn.

OKAY, aku rasa aku dh lari objektif. Anyhow, terima kasih segelen kpd segenap makhluk yg bersama sy hingga ke detik ini. By that I mean thanks to Hazirah Mokhtar, Syazwani Zakaria dan Syafiqqa Shaqqira :) Nk kasi jiwang sikit, you guys are my superhero. Tnpe korang aku rasa aku dah dekat rooftop BCB skrg. So, I love you olz lah kn.

Dan tiba-tiba aku rasa nak shopping. Sgt lah takde kena mengena.

"Alyaa, ingat! Tahun baru ni ubah sikit perangai. Temper tu kawal. Malas tu kurangkan. Jaga hubungan dgn Allah. Belajar tu biar semangat. Walaupun kau akn berhenti half-way. Restart balik faith kau. Aku tau kau blh. Hargai kawan-kawan. Jaga hbgn dgn diorang jgk. InsyaAllah tahun 2011 ni pn tk kurang hebatnya dgn 2010. InsyaAllah. May you be a better person :)"

Bai baiii.

Paranoid

2010-12-29T08:14:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Yah, regarding the topic, I am paranoid. Paranoid mcm, okay ... malu nak cakap ni ... emm ... Okay, saya paranoid dgn adanya 'hantu' dan someone breaking into my house. There! I've said it! *Aduhh, kau ni rojak lah Alyaa!

BUKAN PARANOID YG TAJUK LAGU JONAS BROTHERS NII !

Anyway, you get my point right? Yes, saya tak blh stay mlm-mlm sangat tnpa ditemani sesiapa sbb nnt saya akn mula berimaginasi. Dengar , nampak benda yg bukan-bukan. Dan saya taip benda ni malam-malam. Tkpe, takpe, mak ade! HAHA :P

Hantu, syaitan lah kan. Bersungguh-sungguh nasihatkan diri jgn takut hantu. Takut Allah tu ha! Neraka! Kau tu bkn byk sgt pahala, Alyaa. Tapi agak sukar yaa kerana saya ni penakut tahap merepek sikit. Lagi2 bila hamster (aka kembar Hazirah) tu, dia aktif malam. I mean, org ckp haiwan blh nmpk ap yg kita tk nmpk. TETAPI. Tabiat hamster ni mmg aktif malam. Org kedai tu ckp dgn aku So sdg cuba tknk fikir lebih2 setiap kali hamster bermain dkt roda dia dgn rakus nya =,='

And someone breaking tu, well. Rumah sebelah dah 2 kali (ke tiga? hmm) masuk org. Rumah aku belum dan InsyaAllah TAK AKAN. All of you might be laughing right now but this is no joke to me. I said it right, I'm paranoid. Hesh. Anjing yg mendiami Taman Sunrise ni pun hobinya menyalak malam-malam. Dah mcm koir diorang menyalak tu. Siap sahut menyahut pulak tu. Nasib baiklah, tidur mati aku ni ada guna.

Btw, dulu pernah! Pukul 3 pagi takde elektrik. Bibik dan aku ddk depan pintu depan, buka sliding door besauuu punya. Aku rilek je first-first (despite anjing2 menyalak mcm haremm). Cek henfon once in a while, tgk jam. Sekali masa tu dah nak tertidur kot, bibik pergi cakap, "Yaa, jgn bukak henfon kau. Anjing bunyi je dr tadi. Takut ade org." (Tambah slang Indon) AND THEN MY PARANOIA STRIKE. Siod punya bibik. Luckily, I got through the night safe and soundly!

Okay, that's all.

Lepas ni baca al-Quran byk2. Biar rumah bercahaya dn dilindungi.

Pesanan dibawa khas oleh Recycle Bin :DD

OH, TAHNIAH HARIMAU MALAYA! YOU GUYS ROCKS AND TOTALLY DESERVE THAT TITLE, CHAMPION !

Don't judge a book by it's cover

2010-12-27T23:11:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Ain, Syaf, Me & Hazirah

So last Sunday I went out with the girls. Don't do much though. Accompany Hazirah buying new shirt, Syaf buying UV Filter and shirt. Went eating at CHARMS. Planned to watch Tron in 3D but we were to late and I don't really want to see Narnia at the moment. While others are showing to late. So, no movies, save money! HAHA :P

Spend most of our time eating and chatting and camwhore-ing. Had loads of fun. Ah! I think the foods at Charm doesn't suit the price. Disappointing really. Hesh! After that, went eating. AGAIN. I know. How is it I want to avoid gaining weight?! On the bright side, Syafiq paid for me. HEHEHEHE. Save money again!

Then, we went to Tasik. Accompanied by a bunch of guys from D Cemerlang. Syaf want to test out her new camera. PFFT ! Pardon my jealousy =,=' Anyway, it's a great day. Feel great meeting 'em after so long. I forgot how much fun is it to be around them ♥

First time hanging out with Wan and Cek B

Okay dah, bebaii.

I know, this post really boring. HAHA, what do I care.

If only you could see yourself right now

2010-12-26T20:12:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum :)

New year is coming in less than a week. And that means school never ending. Then weeks of sport and sweat and sunburn. After that maybe Kawad Daerah? Don't know if I'm joining though cause I'm not even sure I'll be staying at STK. My mom wants me to, but I'm on the other hand want to feel life on boarding school.

Pfft Alyaa, you might break in one week. With homesick and everything. Don't put your hope to high -,-' Then, school stuff, all enough. Except for stationery. Don't know when going to buy them but it's okay. Still got stock from this year. Hehe. I'm such a jimat person you know :P

As for new year, I would like to keep the spirit up. When I need to learn Bio and Add Math, that pretty sums up that I'm not a kid anymore. But not in the sense of having fun though. More subjects, more revisions, less internet, less laptop. I just made that deal with my dad. And with that, my life is officially boring. Euu. I know.

Kay, ciaos!

This is for you, you liar :)

I'm learning. Slowly.

2010-12-20T23:25:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Sorry for the lack of update walaupun dlm post sebelum ni dah berkobar-kobar taknak blog lemau lagi. HEHE. Tapi seriously, aku sgt sibuk. Bayangkan ;

Kluang ke BP ke Bangi ke Perak ke Puncak Alam ke Bangi ke KL ke Bangi ke BP ke Kluang.

'Ke' dia ada berapa byk? Destinasi dia ad berapa banyak? Belum kira R&R serta abang-abang bangla yg aku jumpa. Kenapa bangla? Saje, hobi -,-'

Objektif sebenarnya nak melawat abang di Perak. Ye la, nk tengok hidup ke, pengsan ke. Cukup tak duit. Ceh ceh, mcm aku tak yg mak nya? Hehe. Seperti biasa la, kalau da berjalan, kene shopping. Ngehhh. The most awesome part is, aku dapat external baruuuuuu *mata bersina-sinar* 500GB *pengsan kejap*bangun balik*

Aku pegang tu pun takut-takut jeh. Takut jatuh! Dahlah USB 3.0 ! Mana nak cari kalau rosak. Abg Aman kata, USB 3.0 ni susah sikit nak cari. Lagi lah bikin gua cuak nak guna. Kang sejarah pasti berulang. Ohooooo, saya dah tahu buat partition *muka tersipu-sipu* sebelum ni tk pndai. Dulu guna 3rd party software, ni tak. Guna Computer management je. HEUUUU, sukaaa :DDD

Walaupun satu hari tu terperap je dlm kereta. Nasib baik adik sedara aku ikut. Walaupun sangat lah menjengkelkan, tapi ade lah teman. Aku ni kekurangan kasih sayang sikit -,-' Ada sesiapa kisah nak dermakan sikit? Email kan kasih sayang anda di alamat ; berikankasihsayang@hatiku.com

Apa yg aku dah merepek? Okay dah. Bai baiii BAAAIII !

It is what it is

2010-12-15T04:43:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum :)

BLOG LEMAU, ya para pembaca sekalian. Satu keterangan berani yang dikeluarkan oleh Syazwani Zakaria berkenaan dgn blog Recycle Bin kononnya konon, konon! (aku tak tau nk letak apa). Adakah Junk thrower nya akan berdiam diri?

Mari ! Kita terjah!!

Menjadi tak gimik tadi? Gahaha, mcm Nas Ahmad gituhh~ Btw, berbalik kepada topik perdana kita. Syaz kata blog aku dah lemau. Definisi lemau di sini adalah ;

Jarang-jarang update
HTML dah tak gah seperti dulu
Banner setakat tulis je
Post pun makin merepek
Org tgk blog gua dah tak gentar dah *ceh, pernah ke ad yg gentar? :p

Dan aku pun bersetuju juga. Tetapi seperti yang anda lihat sekarang, saya dah mula memanjat tangga gatal-gatal-godeh-HTML-dgn-CSS-dan-buat-banner-guna-adobe. Anda pernah jumpa tangga sebegitu rupa? Tak pernah, saya tahu. HAHA *tak kelakar pun, Alyaa!

Tapi memang pun, kebelakangan ni malas sangat nak update. Mungkin sbb hidup pun tengah terumbang-ambing. Tu yang takde selera nak menaip. Org yg baru buat blog pun followers dah makin ramai dari aku. Tp aku bersyukur kepada sesiapa yg follow sekarang. Sbb aku jenis tak advertise blog. Sebab bila fikir balik, siapa jeh nak tau pasal rutin harian aku. Kalau tgk traffic pun, click byk dtg drpd blog orang lain. Thanks kepada 'orang lain' tu. Heee.

InsyaAllah tak lemau lagi Recycle Bin lepas ni, OH YA, untuk pengetahuan semua, blog Syaz lagi lemau! Dah basi terus dah agaknya! GAHAHA, jgn marah ya awak ;)

Kay dah bebaii !

Home sweet home

2010-12-11T06:30:00.000-08:00

Parents selamat sampai di Malaysia jam 9.48 malam semalam. Alhamdulillah :)

We do this every year

2010-12-06T21:51:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Setiap tahun, kita buat list. Azam kita utk tahun baru. Aku pun tak terkecuali. Dan aku yakin, byk azam kita tak tertunai pun. Awal-awal je semangat. Bulan dua, bulan tiga. Makin hilang dahh. Kejap je benda ni. Tp benda ni bkn merugikan pun. Mana tahu kali ni betul-betul beri semangat dekat kita? Aku pun setiap tahun buat list ni. Tp tahun ni belum lagi. InsyaAllah kejap lagi :)

Semoga tahun baru ni, ada perubahan dlm diri aku. Semoga tahun baru ni aku bijak sikit buat keputusan. Semoga tahun baru ni tugas aku sebagai hamba Allah terlaksana. Semoga tahun baru ni, aku mampu banggakn mak ayah aku. Semoga tahun baru ni aku lebih semangat belajar. Semoga tahun baru ni akan lebih baik dr tahun terdahulu. Anyway,

Salam Maal Hijrah (1432).

This one, I cannot repair.

2010-12-06T21:14:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum :)

"My name is Khan and I'm not a terrorist."

Well, while other girls busy obsessing about K-Pop artist like how I used to, but now not so much, I'm busy Bollywood-ing. Today I watched , My name is Khan which is effin' epic. This story revolved around the life of a a muslim man name Khan the time before and after the 9/11 attack. It was heartbreaking. In addition, the main hero which is of course, Shahrukh Khan, is autistic. I cried several times actually -,-

I don't know what else to say actually. Just that you should really watch this. Although the downloading might takes up a long longg time since it's 2 hours and a half, it really worth it though. Like seriously.

"Bring back what once was mine."

And then I went to cinema again to watch Rapunzel. IN 3D. Beat that. HAHA. Biasalah, budak jakun mmg macam ni. Dulu cermin mata 3D bodoh-bodoh je. Mcm kertas. Tgk pun tk mcm terkeluar sgt. Sedih kan dulu. Skerang, hambek kau. Cermin mata dah lah besar. Berat pulak tu. Aku tgk terpaksa pegang cermin mata nya. Kalau tak sakit hidung. Gmba pun keluar lawa jehh. Sikit lagi aku nak sentuh lantern yg betul-betul dekat sebelah kiri mata aku mse tu. Sekali lagi aku tekan kan, budak jakun mmg macam ni :D

The last part when Flynn died and some kind of glowing thing came out from his body, I thought he's going to live his entire life with a flower growing from inside of his body. And now he's being chased instead of Rapunzel. Seriously, I thought like that. Fairytale. Anything can happen right? Just not that I guess. Hehe. Anyway, the movie was great despite how predictable it is :)

Sorry for the sudden change from BI to BM and to BI again. Just felt like doing so. And this post seems like a movie review? Haha. Whatever.

That's all kot,

Bebaii :)

Love is friendship.

2010-12-04T06:34:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum :)

This week I've been watching lots Hindustans movie. I actually adore Shahrukh Khan and I sang to all the songs in the movie. I got some of them on my iTunes playlist too. And! I learned the song and can literally play it on the keyboard. Yeah, I'm freaking awesome like that. So, I've been downloading movies up to 3 GB since Hindi movie usually takes up to 3 and a half hour. I have all the CDs at home but since now I'm in BP, I had no choice. I was bored. Like really. Bored.

And here is the shocking part. MY COUSINS NEVER WATCH A SINGLE HINDI MOVIE. NEVER. Children, you can close your mouth now. Seriously, at first I thought she was kidding. But then it was true and I go "whaaaaaaaaaaaaat?" In case to whoever reading this, never watch these kind of movies too, please, go download now. You're missing one of life most interesting adventure.

It's fun to watch the romance, not to mention hilarious when the actors suddenly burst out singing and dancing like mad. And when the song's over, they are back to normal. It was really funny but entertaining. Call me loser, I don't care. I'm an universal listener, you should be too. And you can start by watching Kuch Kuch Hota Hai. My all time favourite :D

Itu jew titeww nak cakap,

bebaiii awwakks awakkss sumeww :P

Keep hanging on and we'll be okay

2010-11-27T10:11:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Hari ni keluar bandar dengan Ain, the long lost friend dan cousin, Iqa. Kitorang standard up sikit, outing dekat BP Mall. HEHE. Berlagak! Padahal haram jadah je BP Mall tu. Bosan nak mati -.-' Datang-datang pergi Popular. Konon cari buku lah. Tak beli pun. Teman Ain beli buku F4. Baik kan dia? Aku tak pergi pun section buku sekolah. HEHO :DD

Kemudian tgk NGANGKUNG! Sokong industri tempatan la konon. Tak best sangat pun. Dan aku tgk wayang kt Bp ni mmg kena depan-depan agaknya. Biar nmpk jelas bulu hidung pelakon-pelakon tu. Biar dongak kepala tu. Kalau kerusi mcm kerusi Ogawa takpe. Ini seat dahlah keras! Lepas tu tegak je. Wtf punya Big Cinema.

Kemudian jalan punya jalan. Ain pun terpaksa pulang. Tsk tsk tsk! jumpa lagi kawan! Peluk, cium lepas tu aku dan Haziqah teruskan ekspidisi menjelajah BP Mall yg tiada apa-apa melainkan bunch of guys yg main bunyi-bunyi mcm tikus dan mungkin mereka ingat kami fikir mereka hot? Entah. HOA HOA ! Tadi jumpa game PSP K-ON! Tp takleh beli sbb lupa nk bwk PSP dan lgpun ramai tgh transfer game. Hesh -.-'

Anyways, saya have fun dengan Ain dan Haziqah. At first awkward dgn Ain sbb lama tak jumpa. But then okay je :) BTW, this is for you cinta hati ! AH ! Ain kata dia pun nangis lepas jumpa awk masa dekat RnR dulu tu. Nmpk tak chemistry korang ni? ♥ HAHA.

DAH, ADIOS AMIGOS!

Buhhbaii :)

You and me, forever

2010-11-27T08:40:00.000-08:00

Kita bersama dah lama kn? At least pada aku lama lah. Masa tu, akhir tahun aku jumpa kau. Aku jatuh cinta terus! Takdir mungkin? Kita bersama pun! Kau sentiasa ada dengan aku. Pergi jauh-jauh, kau mesti ada sekali. Kau tk pernah hampakan aku. Kau terima je apa yg aku bagi dekat kau, untung kn aku dapat kau? Tp aku ni bengong, tak reti hargai, brape kali aku biarkn kau jatuh mcm tu je. Bodoh kn aku ni? Mgkn kau dah fed up dgn aku, akhir-akhir ni, kau buat hal. Bila aku perlukan kau, kau merajuk, moody. Dah taknak dah segala benda yg aku nk beri. Seringg je berbunyi. Rupanya, ajal kau dah hampir. Aku yg tak perasan. Terima kasih sayang, sebab selalu ada utk aku. Skrg kau dah pergi tp aku akn tetap ingat kat kau. Terima kasih sebab sentiasa ada untuk aku. Kau kuburkn lah diri kau dgn segala apa yg aku dah beri. Even berat nak lepaskn kau pergi, tp terpaksa. Aku akan sentiasa sayang kau ;'(

REST IN PEACE

Mister Hard Disk ♥

Talk about awkward !

2010-11-19T08:54:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum :)

I don't know what's up with me yesterday. I listen to cranky old songs and cried. While accompanying my 8 years old cousin playing pondok-pondok. I became her (one and only) customers since her sister was sleeping soundly -.-' She 'cooked' me Nasi Goreng Ayam and etc. For once, I felt like a kid and I hate it. Cause she talked ! Like NON STOP! And she made me 'ate' what she cooked and joined the 'VIP club' for her 'restaurant'. Can you imagine THAT?! It's tiring being around her since I'm not used having a little sister. Not that I love her any less :P

And then! I saw an opportunity! I was like, "Imah, buat kan Kak Yaa roti sapu kacang dengan kaya! Buat betul-betul ! Baru macam restoran!" She was freakingg happy and ran to the kitchen to made what I asked her. HAHA, save me all the work :P Am I clever or what?!

Moreover, I go online on Facebook IM and actually replied to every chat box that pop-up ed. I never really talk to strangers cause my mom won't let me (HAHA. Ma ass, lame excuse, I know) but yesterday I did. As much as i hate to say this, it actually felt nice. Knowing people. And I think I just sounded... arrogant? Ergh, sorry.

And today I went to watch Harry Potter at Square One BP. The story is epic and of course everyone knows it. I enjoyed the movie minus the part where I had to sit on the first row. I can see Harry CLEARLY since the screen is RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. And I need to dongak my kepala! Addtion to the annoying-ness, a Chinese boy that sat behind me kept on kicking my seat. I was like, you freakingg bastard ! Grrr!

While watching, me and my cous kept on saying "Hermione lawa kann! Hermione lawa gilee! Hermione lawa mcm Alyaa lah!" Okay, the last part was not true. Hehe. But seriously, I don't know how she can be sooo gorgeous! All I have for her is envy cause she's freakingg beautiful and by using the word 'beautiful' , it's an understatement. I'm officially in love with you Emma Watson ♥ Hah!

So long then,

Buhbaaiii,

nak mimpi Emma Watson!

Pssstt! I MISS MY CINTA HATI, Nur Hazirah Mokhtar! Saya rindu nak guling-guling atas toto. Peluk-peluk. Dengar lagu lama-lama lepas tu nyanyi dlm versi sengau. Saya rindu nak tidur dgn dia. Rindu nak bangun lps tu terus nmpk muka air liur basi dia! Saya byk bendaaa nak cerita kat diaaa! Saya malas nk taip mesej panjang-panjang! HUAAA :((

It's not 'goodbye', it's 'see you again'.

2010-11-17T18:08:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum :)

This year had been a wonderful roller-coaster like journey. The beginning was incredible and half way, I had a mental breakdown. Towards the ending, it's just sparks all over again. Now, I'm, preparing for another breakdown. Like I always say, awesome.

Its kinda funny to think about school. Throughout the year, we want more holiday. But on the last day of school, we forget about holidays, for deep inside.. WE FREAKINGG MISS SCHOOL. I miss my friends. Seriously, I do. You know what? I'm proud of my friend. I'm proud I chose them to be close to me. If not for them, I'm not who I am today. We cracked with laughter everyday and never one day with them is dull and not worth remembering. So thank you friends and nonetheless, I freaking love you guys :)

It's a sad thing I had to spend my holidays in Batu Pahat. Plans for hanging out and Elitegraphy just crash and burn. And it doesn't help my CH, got a story but she wanted to tell me face to face and I can't go to Kluang. I guess I'll have to call her and force her to tell me. Or maybe webcaming if the internet actually be nice and not slowing the connection.

Moreover, someone owe me a bowl full of Tom yam since last year! He must fulfill his promise because I'm afraid if too late, he won't be available again. I hate going through the same thing and by that I mean, being blamed for something I didn't do. Clearly, I'm out of topic, sorry -.-'

And you my dear you, we actually had fun and shared something special together. Once, twice. I don't know, I lost my counts. I love you. Always have, always do and always will. But maybe we're never meant to be together. I think there's a part of me that will always miss you. All these while, things never ended well between us, but this time I'm glad it does. Fate never had plan for us ,it's just me forcing destiny to do otherwise. But now I'll stop. My journey is still a long way to go and you're just one of my few RnR. Maybe you came into my live for me to learn something and then let you go. I'm done playing this game and fall for every single one of your tricks. I don't blame you cause I'm the stupid one here. So now I will stop. Stop putting my hope on you ;)

“You broke her. You completely crushed her. But she’s smart enough to stop in her tracks, and ask herself why she’s still doing this, and what will become of it. The answer is, she still loves you& always will. But not in the sence of needing you, the ” I would die for you.” way. More in the sence that no matter what, she’s always going to have some sort of feelings for you, and will watch out for you, making sure that you don’t end up hurt, and that you don’t make the same mistakes she made, with you.” -Tumblr :)

I'm not you and I'm not trying to be

2010-11-14T16:45:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Minggu lepas aku benar-benar bersukan. Bermula dengan Pangkor, pun dah mcm bersukan. Bersukan dalam air. Balik sekolah, ada game netball. Datang-datang diorang suruh aku jd GS atau dl term semput nya , Goal Shooter. Aku manalah ada buat muka wtf. Aku dgn tiang gol tu mmg dah ada sejarah brdarah sejak zaman hingusan dulu. Tak pernah satu bola pun melepasi hoop. Gol tu cemburu dengan aku barangkali (?).

Oh ya, I jadi WA akhirnya :D

Sayangnya, kelas aku tak menang pun netball. But it's okay. Kami have fun. Walaupun hanya beberapa org yg betul-betul beri komitmen dlm game, bersyukur jelah. Org-org ini lah yg tak ego, respect org lain, tak takut sauna (ma ass, sila terasa kepada yg berkenaan.) HAHA. Kemudian main tarik tali! Perempuan tarik tali dan menang bila against lelaki ! Nasib baik lah Majalah 3 tak dtg, kalau tak, scout pun hilang lah publisiti ! :P Cerita mcm aku tak yg tolong tarikkan sekali tali tu? Padahal tak pun. Kekoke :P

Sabtu pula, pergi Reble. Main badminton. Dlm 80 rally shuttlecock yg mendatang, aku dpt pukul dlm 10 ke 20 sahaja. Cool kan? Aku mmg tak pandai main badminton, di paksanya main. Itu lah jadi nya. Siap kena train dgn ayah Shafiq pula tu. Haihh. Bengang, bengang -.-'

Agak-agaknya dah nmpk belum muka atlet ni?

HAHA, atlet your ass lah.

Kayy peeps, buhbaii :)

It's a trend or an art, let the audience decide.

2010-11-13T20:17:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum :)

So this is a response to Atieqah's post titled 'Overloaded people doen't know art'. I just feel there's a need to give a proper response to this topic since most people talked about this recently.

For me, there's no harm in buying a DSLR cost near to 5000 bucks. Rich people they have money and it's not like we can order them on what to do with their money. Let them spend it how they like. Of course, there's a better way on spending them but let them realize it on their own. Don't satisfy them on showing how you notice their new camera since you yourself know that they just want to show off.

Of course, for some people it's a trend and once they have it, they think they are cool enough. You know what? Just ignore them. Just ignore how they plastered an arrogant face with their brand new and expensive DSLR. It's their parents' money who go to waste.

For me, everyone is a photographer even they captured pictures using a cheap mobile phone. The title 'photographer' is not something you need to officially earn it like the title 'Datuk' or 'Datin'. Everyone can claim they are a photographer. No one can take it from you no matter good or how bad your pictures are. I have nothing against people going around saying they are a photographer. It depends on how talented you are and how people response towards your arts.

You can read in the magazine or the web on how the DSLR works. All the AV, F, M, DOF, ISO and so on. You can read all you want and be prepared but the real deal is when you hold the DSLR yourselves and choose how to set the settings. Believe me, you will just want to change to Auto. That's me when I first hold them too but thank god, I never gave up and I can proudly says I seldom use the 'Auto' mode. Only when I'm too lazy. My favourite is the 'Av' ;) What you read is only theory, let see how great you are with all the talking when you do the practical.

For me, people with passion will never give up and ignore what people says. Just bring your DSLR everywhere including the RnR. Who cares. It's your passion! If you say you're too embarrass to bring your camera cause you're afraid on how people might response, then it's not really passion. Normal pictures, so what? It's one way to have fun. And it's a step of learning. Slowly, your pictures will be adored :)

No offence taken please,

saya datang secara aman

dan makanya saya pergi juga secara aman.

HEHOOO :D

Buhhbaii !

You came back and stitch my heart together

2010-11-06T18:07:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum ;)

Saya baru balik dr Pangkor! Belum 24 jam pun di Kluang tp saya sangat rasaaa nak balik Pangkor sekarang ni. Rugi siapa tak ikut. Serius. Saya sanggup potong kuku kalau saya tipu! HAHA.

Anyways, masa kat sana, saya satu group dgn Tikas, Najeiv, Segon, dan makcik dua org tu la kan. Isi air dlm botol, main sungai asid, buat istana pasir. Awwww! Rindu ;( Kemudian, saya mandi laut ! Snorkling, main jet ski. Taklah mati kebosanan kat pangkor seperti yang degembar gemburkan oleh Hani. HEHE.

Yg paling saya rindu, makan burger tepi pantai malam-malam buta. Terima kasih kepada Syaf kerana menjayakan mlm tersebut. Seriously, happy gila masa tu! Dahlah first time Hazirah belanja saya. Mmg mcm keajaiban dunia yg ke-8 lah!Dan saya juga rasa kandungan gula dlm badan saya semakin meningkat sebab mkn 3 ais-krim dlm tempoh masa 2 hari ;O Tapi memandangkan org dah belanja, lenjan sahaja lah :D

(Dah tak tau nak sambung apa). Byk cerita kat pangkor tp maybe saya takkan cerita kot. Sebab ... entah. Berharga sangat nak kongsi ramai-ramai. Kawan-kawan baik saya je yg tahu ape jadi. Sedih, gembira, nangis, gelak saya kat sana, saya harap saya dapat simpan sampai bila-bila :)

Noktah. Takde mood tiba-tiba nak membebel.

Bebai.

As if sacrificing for me isn't enough

2010-10-30T23:36:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Maaf ya, nak update pada 28 Oktoberr tapi terlupe. Biaselah, saya tak minum Long Jack. Short Jack je saya mampu -.-' Mana-mana jalan pun (anyways) kita balik ke topik perdana kita.

En Khairudin dan isterinya Pn Rahimah telah selamat mendarat di Tanah Suci. Tsktsktsk, sedih lahh juga. 43 hari mereka mengabdikan diri, beribadah kepada yg satu. Mereka berlepas dari KLIA pd 28 Oktober jam satu pagi saat di mana saya sudah ngorokk di rumah dan mamai apabila ibu tercinta call kata dia dah nak boarding.

Kpd sesiapa yg sudi, doakan kesejahteraan ibu bapa saya. Mohon uruskan mereka dipermudahkan dan kesihatan mereka sentiasa terjamin. Doakan mereka dpt haji yg Mabrur. Dan doa juga mak tak lupa bawa pulang jubah lawa-lawa utk saya. HEHOO :D

Sekarang ini sy sudah menceroboh masuk rumah Hazirah. Dan dia sdg tidur dengan bau telurnya sebab dr petang semalam tak mandi selepas Jai Ho di bandar dan di Pet Shop. Bercerita ttg Jai Ho di Pet Shop, aku jumpa Landakk! KEKOKE! Excite gila masa tu. First time nmpk haiwan-haiwan eksotik ni ! mana tak teruja! Lepas tu pet rabbit yg Hazirah nak tuntut masa birthday dia.

Ya aku tahu, sudah menyimpang dari haji ke pet shop. Tak nmpk lansung kesinambungan nya.

Okay folks, mak Hazirah dah panggil makan,

Bebaii :)

We tend to get on each other's nerve

2010-10-26T10:17:00.000-07:00

CLICKY HERE PLEASE :)

October haven't been nice to me

2010-10-25T06:13:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

I know I've been on hiatus for a while. Not apologizing though 'cause I'm pretty sure no one is waiting for me to post a new entry so yeah, whatever -.-'

Hari ini as in 25th October, Syaf tanya yg, "kau suka tak dengan zaman remaja kau?" Dan aku tah cara dia tanya sangatlah membanggakan A. Samad Said dan InsyaAllah boleh jadi pengulas bahasa Melayu (?) Aku terfikir juga, suka ke?

Sekarang mungkin lah tak suka. Gaduh sebab lelaki, hilang kawan baik, result exam teruk. Tp bila dah besar mesti kita rindu kan dgn zaman-zaman tak berapa nak milenium ni? Rindu nak lepak dgn kawan-kawan dan gelak mcm dunia ni kami punya. Haihh. Masa depan pun tak rancang lagi. Hidup belum tentu terjamin. Kadang-kadang aku takut fikir masa depan (selalu sebenarnya). Rasa mcm nak stay kat sekolah je.

Bila fikir balik tahun-tahun lepas rasa kelakar pun ada. Mcm," ohmaiigawdd, aku nangis sebab tu je ke? " Heho -.-' Of course, byk la memori. Kwn baik yg dah kenal dr darjah satu tp sekarang dah tak tegur pun, siap mintak putus kawan. (Awesome, I know). Ex-boyfriend(s) lagi. Semua ni berharga tp sesetengah org just tak tahu nak hargai.

Aku bukan jenis org yg jeopardize sesuatu hubungan tu utk benda remeh. I've learned from my mistakes. Tak guna korbankan persahabatan kita dengan benda yg .... Entah. Tolonglah, jangan bazir masa-masa sekarang ni dgn drama-drama bersiri yg tentu-tentu takde org tengok. Tak perlu nak hierbola sgt. Jgn buat soap-opera sendiri. Kita tak tahu masa kita panjang lg ke tidak.

Apa objektif post ni? Mungkin cuma nak bagitahu, hargailah zaman remaja. Ini peringatan utk aku jugak. Aku pun nak berubah (kott). Make the most out of these. I know I can do better and I deserve better. Dan mungkin aku kecewa dengan sesiapa yg berkenaan. Sbb aku ingat persahabatan 8 tahun aku dengan dia lebih kukuh dr setakat ini je.

Okayy lah. Aku JAI HOOO dulu.

Bebaaii :)

Chisel my heart out of stone

2010-10-14T03:19:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Sekolah rasanya sangat membosankan sekarang ni. Tensi pulak asyik duduk dlm dewan. Dgn keadaan yg suram lalu mengundang mood-mood yg tidak sepatutnya sgt lah tidak menggembirakan hari aku. Kalau PMS lagi lah. Mau tak sakit jiwa kau. Kalau aktiviti best takpe. Ni tak!

Ceramah dan ceramah. Mungkin hari lain ada sukan-sukan tp aku rasa nak tidurrr sahaja. Rasa nak ddk dalam kelas je tengok muka Andy 24/7. Haaa! Kenapa Andy? Itu kita tak tau. (Bagi siapa yg tahu intonasi ayat tadi, jom gelak sama-sama. HAHA. Bagi siapa yg tak tahu, ehhh! Susah lah!)

Alhamdulillah, my parents insyaAllah akan menunaikan haji 28/10 ni. Doakan mereka dikurniakan kesihatan dan kekuatan utk menunaikan haji dengan sempurna :) Masalahnya sekarang aku tiada tempat bergantung. Tempat berteduh masa mak bapak aku di tanah suci. Plan tak buat-buat lagi.

Aku still nak pergi sekolah despite all the boring activities. Mungkin lepas ni slow talk dgn ayah kot. Nak tinggal rumah siapa. Plan ada, tinggal dpt keizinan sahaja. Takut je aku terkapai-kapai nanti. Makan minum tak berjaga. Haihh.

Nak tinggal rumah sendiri ayah kata > "Tak takut ke nanti bibik jual kau?" OHHMAAKKKAUU. Siape je nak beli aku?
Nak tinggal rumah Hazirah, ayah cakap > "Kalau gaduh nanti kau nak tidur mana?" HAAIHH, bapak i ni mmg suka fikir masa depan.

Dah lah, bebaiiii,

Banyakkkk banyakk kasih sayang!

In case one day we forgot each other

2010-10-11T18:17:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Alhamdulillah, dpaat juga update blog. Ada cerita best. Tp sekarang mungkin dah tak best sangat sbb sedikit basi -.-'

Hari tu, hujung minggu parents Hazirah were out of town. Di ajaknya aku dan Syaf tidur rumah dia. Gedebak gedebuk pujuk sana pujuk sini, dapat lah tidur rumah dia. Bermula lah misi-menghancurkan-rumah-encik mokhtar 101.

Plan A : The worst saloon ever opened.

Hazirah dgn bergitu yakin dan saksama mengatakan yg dia mampu gunting rambut aku. Kerana terlalu percayakan kawan, rambut aku kelihatan sangatlah like ass right now. Mana lah ada omaigucci aku masa Hazirah potong. Daripada panjang jadi PENDEK habis. Jadi, cita-cita Hazirah untuk membuka saloon apabila beliau besar dan matang sikit terpaksa dikuburkan. Aku tak sanggup org lain menerima nasib seperti ku. Biarlah aku seorang yg terseksa. asdfghjkl xP

Plan B : Dinner

Masa ni takde gambar. Ada video je.

Apabila tiga dara bermaharajalela di dapur, mmg nasib baiklah tak terbakar dapurnye. Meletup sana sini adelah. Dinner kami pukul 12.30 malam. Mula masak pukul 10 lebih kalau tak silap. Nampak apa yg ade dlm peti ais, bantai je. Syaf konon nak bagi resepi sosej yg sedap. Katanya masukkan kari.

Hazirah dengan begitu yakin (sekali lagi) masukkan lah serbuk kuning dlm kuali beserta dgn sosej. Sekali Syaf tegur, "Itu bukan serbuk kunyit ke?" JENGJENGJENGGG! Makanya, menu pertama adalah sosej kunyit! Awesomeee. Kemudian makan maggi dlm periuk kecik. Ala-ala Korea lah konon. Haram tak jadi. Dan fries sedikit. Alhamdulillah tiada siapa yg cirit birit. Tidur pun lena.

Plan C : Breakfast

Kali ni okay sikit. Masak cendawan goreng, sosej, nugget, roti telur dan asam pedas cecah roti. Mmg macam nak ajak jiran sebelah makan sekali lah. Air pula, horlicks ketul-ketul. Jgn tanya apa benda tu.

Plan D : Clubbing

Bayangkan bertapa coolnya kami apabila kami berjamming pagi-pagi buta. Takdelah buta sangat. Dah pukul 8 ke 9. Buka radio mmg suruh taman skodeng tu dengar sekali. Bawa turun gitar tong, gitar elektrik dan tabla. Ye, tabla. Cool, saya tahu.

Mula lah jamming. Semua main petik je. Asal ade bunyi. Bunyi ya bukan irama lagu. Sempatlah rakam tiga album. Limited edition, dekat Speedy dah habis stok dah. Keadaan sangat high lah ketika tu. Busuk, masam tiada siapa kesah. Bau semua dah sama dengan je. Justin Bieber, Jambu batu semua muncul. It was AWESOME :D

In a freakin' nutshell, it was one of the most unforgettable day in my life. I love my friends because their brain is a little bit to the left. Not too centre -.-' Dan, peristiwa ini semua berlaku sebelum PMR. Kononnya malam tu nak belajar. Haremmm, habis notebook aku diconquer oleh Syaf dan Hazirah. Buku bukak pun tak.

Okay, bebaii,

Banyak-banyak kasih sayang utk kau.

Freedom starts today

2010-10-11T04:16:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

YEAH INTERNET SURFERS. I'M BACK.

How much of our life depend on "what if"? How many times we wish we would do things differently. Will we end up like this? Or the decision that we chose not to pick actually make our life a lot better. You know, like :

What if I waited for him?
What if I erased that answer?
What if I didn't watched that movie and study?
What if I just open that book and read?
What if I answered A for that question?
What if I'm not her friend?
What if I woke up early today?
What if I realized that you are worth it earlier?
What if I didn't went hanging out that day?

How many "what if" makes you want to lock yourself and break down. How many of that makes you want to look back and change everything? Me? TONS of them.

But life must go on. You can't change what had happened instead work you ass of and create a magnificent ending. I know I haven't been studying for PMR that hard. During the week of examination, I tend to sleep a lot. Stress? Pfftt, as if.

October haven't been nice to me. Hoping it's going to change sooner and not later. Due to my stupidity and do-before-think action, I've done several stupid and embarrassing mistakes. For now, all I can do are tawakal and praying to god I'll achieve the best result. 8A, aminn :)

For those who are taking PMR next year, don't slack off. You might think you have 10 more months. But before you realize, only 2 months left. I regret for not motivating myself and kept telling I have much more time to do the revisions. But InsyaAllah, I've tried my best and I think I've given my all.

Banyak-banyak kasih sayang,
Bebaii ;)

You said you'd meet me in my dreams

2010-09-17T01:43:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

So, today my school had this Jamuan raya where 2 class became one and open a Rumah Terbuka for all. It was okay at first but when the rain started to fall, things were wet and uncomfortable. There were not enough plates and cups yet all of them were just like, 'ohh.' In a nutshell, it was fun. I guess. And no, our class didn't win.

OH ! Although were we two class, 3RK1 and 3TES1, it didn't felt like so. We were minding our own business and talked only if needed. The boys and the girls. I was kind of disappointed really. Well, I'm one of them too so talk no more. But hey, at least I made some effort !

PMR is just around the corner. I'm, afraid of counting the days left because it's so near. Like freakingg yeah besides me -.-' InsyaAllah this is the last day I'll go online. If I'd go online, might only be for 5 mins or so. Sacrificing is a must if one wants to succeed. Pray for my success, please. I will always pray for you guys who are taking big exam this year. Let's make our parents proud :)

Banyak banyak kasih sayangg! Bebaiii !

Until my heart stops beating

2010-09-14T06:08:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

SEBELUM BERMULA SAYA CUMA NAK KATAKAN YANG INTERNET LEMBAP LIKE HARAM SEKARANG NI.

Okay, raya tahun ni seperti tahun-tahun lepas. Pagi-pagi pergi kampung di Kampung Palembang. Saya suka pergi sana masa hari raya sbb takbir raya jelas gila, surau betul2 sebelah rumah la katekan. Family saya antara yg first datang. Family Athirah mmg tiap-tiap tahun confirm paling last la kan. HEHOO :P

Saya rasa tahun ni raya lagi okay dr tahun lepas. Tp ramai kata tahun ni raya tak meriah. Tak kesah la, pendapat masing-masing :) So, kami berhijau kali ni. Mmg pokok-pokok dgn rumput tgk family saya suka je. Kaum sejenis dia la konon. Lepas ni family saya blh tlg buat iklan Save the Earth :D

Lepas dekat kampung, balik rumah kami. Sedara belah ibu pulak dtg visit rumah saya. Tatkala semua sdgn enak menjamu rendang, lodeh dgn segala maca, saya dan ika buat photoshoot dekat depan. Menggedik like haremm la mase tu.

HOOOOOHH, korang mesti duit raya dah habis kira kan? Masuk dlm buku tiga lima. Senaraikan mcm mana nak habiskan duit. Ish ish ish, tengok aku. Sampul duit raya tak bukak lagi. Malas nak kira =____= Haih, barang dah tersenarai dlm kepala otak. Takut nak tulis sbb nnt lebih-lebih pula. Syg nak belanja kan duit. Lepas dengar cerita abg terseksa dekat Teronoh duit RM500 tiap-tiap bulan tak cukup.

Kay then, until next time. Have fun!

You know what, I used to expected like, tons of things from you. Maybe after some times, you would realize that I AM important. You would try your best to be like what we used to. But not anymore. Let just say I don't want much except that you show you still think of me every once in a while. We are still friends somehow. Your words, you texts, I don't expect them to be there when I woke up. I've swallowed the facts that I'm not in your life anymore. Guess what? It hurts less. Much more less then before.

It's okay people get to live in their happy lives, happy fairy tales. Maybe Allah got some other plans with me. Maybe my time is still yet to come. I'm happy that people around me, my best friends are happy. At least the happiness might brush on me a little. Of course people changes, they do the things they say they wouldn't. Those facts had settled in me. I am not empty. I'm a strong girl. Don't go cheering yet. I ain't falling :)

1 Syawal

2010-09-09T08:54:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

SELAMAT HARI RAYA

MAAF ZAHIR DAN BATIN :)

Bahagia kan rasa dapat dengar takbir? Sambut raya dgn org tersayang? saya tahu saya bahagia. HEHE.

Saya Nur Alyaa bt Khairudin, mohon maaf kpd sesiapa sahaja yg berkenaan. Saya manusia biasa. Selalu mengutuk, selalu mencaci, selalu buat ikut suka hati. Kalau ada yg terkecil hati dgn segala apa yg saya dah buat, harap diampunkan dan tak simpan dalam hati. Jika ada yg terasa, say amohon ampun. Sedangakan nabi pun ampun kan umatnya ;)

Have fun hari raya ni. Jangan lupa diri. Kita raya seminggu je. Lepas tu bg form 3, naik periksa exam makin dekat. Manfaatkan masa. Sama-sama InsyaAllah kita score 8A. *e'eh, ini ucapan sesat. hehe :P

Kay, ciao !

Drama class 101

2010-09-08T05:49:00.000-07:00

I have some confessions to make :

1- I am claustrophobic level 1

This is no joke. I do get scared of small and tiny spaces. Or in a crowded place. My breathing would be very hard, I sweat a lot and headache mula bermaharajalela -.-'

2- I am having another marathon of Ghost Whisperer

Exam is coming yet I am having a marathon of Jim Clancy hotness. Awww like double triple there please. My brother was like , "dah berapa kali tgk ni?" so does my mother. Hmmm.

3- Craving to play all the tycoons series

Blame my cous cause she played them at her house when I last visited her and she won't let me play. So I just shut down my mom lappy because I got stuck at god-knows what level of Hospital tycoon that I've been playing since this afternoon.

7th September 2010 >

OHH YEAHHHH, today is my mom's birthday so, Happy Birthday mak! :D Semoga panjang umur dan dimurahkan rezeki. Semoga mak dapat pergi haji thn ni dan dpt sempurnakan dgn sebaiknya. InsyaAllah mak jgn sakit-sakit lagi. Migraine every week. No no no. Hehe. I love you mum! Oh, hari ini birthday mak Azizan juga :DDD

P/S : Sorry for no pictures. Lame I know. But I'm lazy. Zzzzz. Ciao.

Mistakes teach me no good

2010-09-01T01:38:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum .

Seriously I feel like so asdfghjkl right now. I don't know. Maybe the fact that everyone tries so hard to have a spotlight shine on them amuse me yet make me want to puke. All matter now are how many friends you have on Facebook, how many followers you have on blogspot and so on. People here and there claim that they are better than others. Said that they are 'original'. Please, define original. Don't lie and say that all you have been doing, don't have the slightest influence from others.

Don't act all drama queen and oh-i'm-the-coolest-creature-that-ever-existed because clearly, there were 'loser' written all over your face. We are all loser on our own kind of way. We are somehow fake here and there. Most of all, we are just some lame posers. Don't deny these facts because I am too. So please, please stop being so cocky and vain. You are no good from others.

In case you are wondering, these are for a group of girls who think that they are so damn good and original that they can look down on others. The I'm-so-cool attitude? Just LAME and bs. If I were given a chance, your face will end up on the bottom of my shoe.

P/S : Akmal Ikhwan greeted me with a salute today. Which just made my day :D He's changed so much since primary school !

Publishing post now.

Buhbye.

This is for the lack of update

2010-08-31T09:04:00.000-07:00

SO, my brother just got back from Japan last 25th of August and it was Pini's birthday :D I love you friend ! My brother brought back these two adorable thing! Guess what? Lenses! A 50mm and a freaking 18-105mm ! Two iPhones and a worn-once Hard Rock Cafe Osaka t-shirt for me. Nice one bro -.-'

Still thinking which of the lenses is going to be mine. My brother asked me to pick one. Can I have both?! Please?! Oh! Anyone interested? I'm selling my lovely Jack 1000D for RM1500. This is no joke people! Trading Mr Jack 1000D with my brother's Mr whatever-his-name-is 450D. Anyone?

And my abg sedara got Nikon D90. Played with them yesterday when he came to my house to take the camera. Srsly, it was too complicated ! The buttons are everywhere and I prefer Canon, still ;)

Put away the DSLR topic now. This entire week I have to take exam at SMSJ. Just the evening session of course. Needless to say how awkward it is being escorted by the famous GPK HEM - which is of course, my dear father - into the exam hall. All the students were staring. And gawking. While I try my best not to embarrassed myself.

I'm pretty pissed at the teacher who stare at my paper every 20mins. He said the paper was so easy which is clearly not since I can't answer most of them. Well, blame myself too for not doing revision =..= Wish me luck for the next four papers please. I need them.

Before I forget,

SELAMAT HARI KEMERDEKAAN YANG KE-53, MALAYSIA!

Hitting my sack now and sorry for updating in English,

just feel like doing so ;P

CIAO !

Lame old story

2010-08-23T02:08:00.001-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Okayyyyyy, jadi, aku dapat A untuk GEO. Ngehngehngeh. Siapa tak percaya, dia tak puasa :P Benda ni dah lama dah, result dpt 2 minggu lepas. Tp baru semangat nak menaip ni membara-bara.

So, percaya tak aku dapat A untuk Geo? Okay man, seriously, percaya ah. Hani dgn Pini semua terkejut aku dapat A untuk Geo. Agak-agak Cikgu Jamilah percaya tak? Hmmm. Yg mcm bangang Hani lah, asyik tanya betul ke aku dpt A untuk Geo. Kenapa? Sbb literally, aku tak ingat peta Malaysia. Tapi itu dulu lah. Takkan asyik nak bodoh je kan? Jadi ambil inisiatif, ingat peta Malaysia sampai peta dunia. Tampal dekat dinding. Alhamdulillah, berbaloi.

Aku mmg lemah la bab-bab koordinat dan apa-apa yg sewaktunya dengan Geografi. Tapi memandangkan nak PMR, kena lah up sikit. Bengang asyik dapat B. InsyaAllah nanti masa PMR geografi aku pun A. Dan juga semua subjek lain. Aminnn :)

Tapi bila aku dapat A untuk Geo, tak bermakna aku tahu mcm mana nak ke Kampung Melayu dari Kluang Mall. Masa Hazirah dan Syaf bercerita, berdebat tentang jauh tak jauh. Aku masih termanggu-manggu, memikirkan, "Kampung Melayu dekat mana? Shell mana yg diorang ckp ni?" -.-' Sampai sini jelah, aku bengang pulak tak tau selok belok Kluang sedangkan 15 tahun dah dekat sini.

Orang Laut dekat zaman Melaka masa Parameswara, cool je. Kan? *tiba-tiba*

Okay, ciao :)

Black and White

2010-08-20T03:48:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Woot woot. Hyper sebentar. Harap dapat beri kerjasama utk turut hyper bersama :D

So, hari tu baca blog Atieqah Abas, beliau ada masuk contest photography. Dan saya rasa sangat tergoda untuk turut serta. Menggedik. Biasalah. So, ini contest dia ;

Syarat - syarat :

Pertandingan ini bermula 26 July berakhir pada 6 September 2010
Hadiah merupakan wang Ringgit dan akan dihantar melalui akaun bank. Jumlah dirahsiakan.
Anda hendaklah meng-Upload gamba hitam dan putih sahaja dan untuk mengelakkan penipuan, gamba itu mesti gamba anda sendiri. kalau ada orang lain menyelit2 tu takpe. Janji anda mesti berada dalam gamba tu. Susahkan?? hahhaaaa. Nak dapat duit memang la susah sikit.
Anda hendaklah menjadi salah sorang follower saya.
Banner atas nie mestilah diletakkan di sidebar blog anda. ala selalu yang kat tepi tu.
Tag at least one person. banyak lagi bagus, dan pastikan orang yang anda tag tu tahu yang dia di tag.
PENTING. Sila tinggalkan link yang anda upload gmba anda tu kat comment post ini yup. nanti sy xtau plak.

Jadi, gambar ada 3. Tapi saya suka yg ini :

Masa kawad. Masa paling bahagia kott. Muehehehe :D Masa ni nampak mcm dah serebeh je. Mcm dah habis kawad. Padahal baru datang dataran kot. Yes, yg gelak like haremm tu pun baruuu je datang dataran. Mcm dah dpt keputusan siapa menang, inilah Kadet Remaja Sekolah Tinggi Kluang Puteri -.-'

So, dlm gambar tu, saya ke tiga dari kiri. Sebelah kak Hana :) Nampak tidak? Yg gambar dekat atas tu saya takde lah sbb saya yg tangkap. Harap tak langgar peraturan ;'( Tapi ini whole picture, even dah gabung 2 gmbar. Kira saya ada lah kan dlm gambar? HEHOHA :DD

Jadi saya dengan bangga nya menge-tag Cinta Hati saya ;

Nur Hazirah Mokhtar :)

One step at a time.

2010-08-15T02:34:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Maaf, gambar hanya gurauan dan tiada kena mengena.

Saya mula-mula nak 50MM. Harganya cuma RM 300++ sahaja. Kalau saya kumpul, dalam masa 9bulan InsyaAllah cukup. Godek sikit dari ibu ayah. Kemudian, kalau tiada pokok tumbang di tengah jalan, saya nak Macro. Itu mahal la. Ada dlm RM1000 tambah-tambah takde tolak. Kalau dah dapat dua ni, baru boleh berangan telepoto lens dan Fish-eye. Yg hanya akan dicapai setelah bekerja 5 bulan. HAHA -.-'

Kemudian saya mahu Holga. Robot 3 Lens pun comel! Tapi mungkin Polariod? Antara tiga tu lah. Tak sampai beribu pun. InsyaAllah kalau dah up sikit, saya nak yg sudah di-mention kan. Diana saya taknak. Saya pun tak tahu kenapa. Haaaaa~ DAN ! Saya mahu join bengkel Photography!

Lepas tu saya mahu high-top. Bukan yg tebal mak aihhh macam Jambu Batu aka Justin Bieber tu. Bukan sama sekali. Yg ala kadar shj. Tapi mahu makan RM1000 jadi saya tolak tepi dulu. Then, Kalau ada Malaysia’s Online Fashion Entrepreneurs’ Weekend lagi, saya mahu pergi ! Kerana di kala saya sedang menaip post yg tiada objektif ini, satu event yg diperkatakan tadi, sedang berlansung di Mid Valey. Dan Soak Republic ada di situ. Sayanggg nyaaa :(

Saya juga mahu ke Pesta Hot Air Ballon tu! Dan juga KL Design Week yg sangat menggugar iman saya. Pemandangan yg saya lihat melalui lensa org lain buat saya rasa sangat rugi yg saya hanya menetap di Kluang. Takde guna mengeluh. Sbb Allah tak suka nanti ! Jadi saya bersyukur sekurang-kurangnya saya ada rumah :D

iamjetfuel shop. Cred to them.

Sebenarnya banyak lagi yg saya mahu seperti cropped jacket dan Grey Denim. Tetapi sekarang bukan masanya. Sekarang saya kena belajar dan score PMR. Straight A InsyaAllah. Aminnn. Setelah itu barulah mintak macam-macam. Jika disuarakan yg saya mahu tiket ke Jepun kepada ayahnda, InsyaAllah TAK dapat. Kerana itu over the moon. Oleh itu, saya hanya mahu wang ringgit agar dapat shopping. HEHOHA!

Saya sekarang sudah mula berkira-kira bagaimana saya hendak melakar masa depan. Mungkin terlalu cepat utk bdk yg hanya berusia 15 tahun, tetapi jika ini semua mampu jadi pembakar semangat, tidak salah bukan?

Sekian, Ciao!

You come and go as you please. And I hate that.

2010-08-13T00:26:00.000-07:00

Alyaa : Cikgu, apa beza sulphate dgn sulphide?
Cikgu : Tak sama! (aku, Suhana dgn Dash gelak2. Of course la tak sama cikgu! Sbb itu saya tanyaa!) blablabla sulphate ada oxigen *aku tak egt dah pastu*
Alyaa : Ohhhh~

Roxa : Alyaa, Alyaa! (Dia duduk belakang aku) Ada org cakap, mak ajar Chemis tapi tu pun tak tau. Ade org ckp eh, bkn aku.
Alyaa : Aaaa, mak aku ajar Fizik. Ckp dgn org tu, tolong bengang sikit.
Roxa : Alyaa! Dia kata, alahh~ sama la tu.
Alyaa : Mak aku ajar Fizik takde main-main dgn sulphate, sulphide. Takde buat tabung uji semua. Tak sama.
Roxa : Haa, ye ye, tau tauu. Bkn aku ckp. Ade org cakap~

Aku tak tahu lah ini diskriminasi apa. Diskriminasi pekerjaan ibu bapa mungkin? Dan aku tahu siapa yg ckp. Dia nak buat lawak ke? Dia nak tunjuk hebat ke? Apa point dia? Aku tak fhm. Seriously.

Kalau iya pun mak aku ajar Chemistry, tak salah kan aku tanya? Kalau mak dia doktor, perlu ke anak dia tahu mcm mana nak membedah org? Takkan? Kalau ayah dia ajar BI, perlu ke dia score Bi 100%? Takkan? Eh, cakap guna otak la sikit. Ini anak dia. Bkn mak dia. Bukan ayah dia. Sbb tu kita ni ke sekolah. Nak belajar. Tau kan ape yg kita tak tahu. Machha, jgn buat aku tensi la deyy!

Peristiwa ni berlaku masa sebelum puasa. Masa kelas tuisyen. Entah, mgkn bdk tu bajet hebat kot? Bajet cool? Mentang-mentang kau terer Science. * Terer ke? :P

Ramadhan kali ini

2010-08-11T04:04:00.000-07:00

Selamat berpuasa kepada seluruh umat Islam!

Semoga tahun ini kita dapat maju lagi selangkah dalam mengecap nikmat syurga. Semoga hidup kita dipenuhi dengan manfaat dan berkat Ramadhan. Jgn hanya berpuasa, nikmati lah apa yg ada disebaliknya :)

I almost forgot how comforting it is to have you around

2010-08-10T04:28:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Saya taknak cerita tentang exam yang menyakitkan jiwa. Saya taknak cerita bagaimana saya begitu cuai masa kertas KH dan GEO. Saya taknak cerita kenapa saya tak boleh jawab Science Paper II yang sangat senang. Saya taknak cerita betapa bengangnya saya kalau ke tandas masa pelajar semua sedang taksub menjawab soalan.

Tapi saya akan cerita bagaimana kerdil nya saya apabila pertama kali menaiki bas awam -.-'

Yeah-yeah, aku ni dah spoil dari kecil. Pergi berhantar, balik berjemput. Kalau aku jalan tu, takde karpet merahbiruhijau tu, taksah la.. Tak turun kereta. Bas sekolah tu aku dah lali. Kamcing dulu dgn pakcik bas aku, Encik Tukijan Muruthanja. Kau nak lawan? Ni bas awam. Yg masuk duit dapat tiket whatsoever. Julung kalinya. Dan terus rasa cool dah.

HAHA, kasihani lah aku. nak pilih bas je dah terpinga-pinga padahal dari stesen bas ke library je kot. Boleh guna kaki sepasang ni ha. Dpt la kuruskan sikit peha. Tapi nak menimba pengalaman punya pasal, naik la juga bas nya. Dan woot-woot. Kami sgt hyper masa dlm bas. Kami itu merujuk kepada aku dan Hazirah. Syaf cool je. Dah biasa la konon.

Kali ke dua naik bas awam, okay, dah tak termangu-mangu sangat. Dah kenal seat bas. Dah pandai cari port lawa. Baru kali kedua. Gila cepat tak aku? HAHA, cepat kepala hot kau :P Dan kali kedua juga, dah camwhore dlm bas. Cool kannnn? Haihhh, susah betul jadi org cool ni. Asyik puji je. *nak muntah sila, nak close tab pun silakan. Heho!

Dan sekarang smgt nak PMR tu kembali membara. Nak travel lps PMR punya pasal. Dah byk planning dah ni. Pergi sana pergi sini. Cuma tak pasti aku tinggal di mana lepas PMR. Harap-harap tinggal rumah je :(

PS : Eagerly waiting for my parcel to arrive!!
C-I-A-O peeps :)